We read the papers so you don’t have to. Today: Coming up in a Rash. Footballer Marcus Rashford’s twelve-hour tequila bender has the press in a tizz. Mind blowing. Elon Musk puts a chip in a human brain and we don’t fancy it. Plus – Total swipe-out. One of our fave sex columnists is binning dating apps. Is she MAD?

Miranda Sawyer is joined by The Bunker Podcast host Jacob Jarvis and comedian Kyrah Gray.

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Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Audio production: Simon Williams. Production. Liam Tait. Assistant Production: Adam Wright. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Socials: Jess Harpin and Kieron Leslie. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

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Would you let Elon Musk chip your brain? — Tabloid frenzy over Rashford night out — Tinder swindle! Why you should ditch dating apps