Nick Epley, a psychology professor at the University of Chicago, explores the transformative power of deep questions in communication. Mandy Len Catron, a creative writing professor known for her viral essay on the 36 questions that lead to love, reflects on how intimate inquiries can forge lasting connections. They discuss the Fast Friends Procedure, revealing how meaningful questions can spark friendships and even romance. Their insights emphasize the art of asking better questions to enhance personal connections and foster genuine relationships.
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question_answer ANECDOTE
Epley's DUIs
Nick Epley's two DUIs as a teen.
The second DUI, where his parents asked 'why' questions, changed his life.
insights INSIGHT
Deep Questions
Not all questions are created equal.
Questions prompting discussions about values, beliefs, and experiences have unique power.
question_answer ANECDOTE
Fast Friends Procedure
The 'Fast Friends Procedure' involves 36 escalating intimacy questions.
Study participants formed strong bonds, with many continuing relationships post-study.
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This book is a collection of essays that delve into the complexities of love and relationships. It includes Catron's viral New York Times article 'To Fall in Love with Anyone, Do This,' which describes her experience with a psychology experiment involving 36 questions to create intimacy between strangers. The book expands on this idea, examining the biological, psychological, and historical aspects of love, as well as Catron's personal experiences and those of her family. It critiques romantic myths and encourages readers to reassess their own understanding of love and relationships.
Supercommunicators
How to Unlock the Secret Language of Connection
Charles Duhigg
In this book, Charles Duhigg explores the secrets of 'supercommunicators' who excel at connecting with others. He delves into the three distinct types of conversations—practical, emotional, and social—and provides practical strategies and case studies to illustrate how to recognize and navigate these conversations effectively. The book includes examples from various contexts, such as jury deliberations, CIA recruitments, and workplace interactions, to demonstrate how communication can be improved. Duhigg emphasizes the importance of active listening, identifying complex emotions, and matching the type of conversation to enhance connection and understanding.
Mind Wise
Nick Epley
Why are some people able to talk with just about anyone—about almost anything? One answer may lie in the questions we ask—and how deeply we ask them. Stick with us here…
In this episode, host Charles Duhigg examines why deep questions are so powerful and how to ask them in everyday life.
He talks to Nick Epley, psychology professor at the University of Chicago and lifelong researcher of deep questions. And we catch up with Mandy Len Catron, 10 years after she wrote the viral New York Times article “The 36 Questions That Lead to Love.”
This Slate miniseries dives into the art and science of meaningful conversations, inspired by Duhigg’s bestselling book, Supercommunicators.
Supercommunicators was produced by Derek John and Sophie Summergrad.
Supercommunicators with Charles Duhigg 
