The Incubator #218 - Father's Day Special with Alex Zavala aka The NICU Dad
In this special Father's Day episode, host Daphna Barbeau interviews Alex Zavala, known as the "NICU Dad". Alex shares his emotional journey of becoming a father to his daughter Emerson, born at just 27 weeks.
Alex vividly recounts the day his wife's water broke, the frantic rush to the hospital, and the overwhelming fear and uncertainty as Emerson was delivered via emergency C-section weighing only 2 pounds 5 ounces. He describes feeling like he was thrust into a nightmare, trying to support his wife, make logistical plans, and grapple with the possibility of losing his daughter.
During Emerson's 67-day NICU stay, Alex did the "NICU dad shuffle" - spending early mornings with his daughter, tag-teaming with his wife in the afternoons so she could be there while he went to work, and returning in the evenings. He highlights the unique struggles dads face, including feeling like an afterthought, battling stress, anxiety and PTSD symptoms, weight gain, and having their trauma go unrecognized.
After Emerson came home, Alex continued to face challenges. His stress increased without the monitors and NICU staff, he became a stay-at-home dad, and suffered health issues from the emotional toll. Seeing a need, he started The NICU Dad website and podcast as resources for dads.
Alex's advice for NICU dads: take care of yourself to be the best version of yourself at home, seek counseling, join peer support groups, and utilize resources from organizations like March of Dimes and Hand to Hold. For healthcare professionals, he advocates involving dads from the start, understanding their unique trauma response, and encouraging them to actively participate in their baby's care.
As always, feel free to send us questions, comments, or suggestions to our email: nicupodcast@gmail.com. You can also contact the show through Instagram or Twitter, @nicupodcast. Or contact Ben and Daphna directly via their Twitter profiles: @drnicu and @doctordaphnamd. The papers discussed in today's episode are listed and timestamped on the webpage linked below.
Enjoy!