Husbands: Don’t Make These Marriage Mistakes! - Ep. 030
Feb 7, 2024
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This podcast discusses common mistakes husbands make in marriages, such as being indecisive, coasting, and not holding their wives accountable. They debunk the 'happy wife, happy life' myth and emphasize the importance of treating wives as partners. The hosts also discuss the significance of being a spiritual leader and protector. Bonus mistake: avoiding infidelity and self-abuse. They highlight the importance of brotherhood and accountability among men.
Being decisive is crucial for effective masculine leadership and prevents stagnation and passivity in marriage.
Coasting and going through the motions leads to an unhealthy and unfulfilling marriage, husbands should actively engage and pursue growth.
Holding wives accountable and fulfilling the role of spiritual leader and protector fosters a healthier and balanced dynamic within marriages.
Deep dives
Being decisive is crucial in masculine leadership
Being decisive is a key attribute of effective masculine leadership. Indecisiveness can lead to a lack of direction and power, and therefore men should strive to make decisions with the available information. It is important to trust oneself to make decisions and understand that making the right decision is not always about being perfect, but rather about making a decision and following through with it. Good decision-making builds confidence and momentum, while indecisiveness can lead to stagnation and passivity.
Avoid coasting and going through the motions
Coasting and going through the motions is a common mistake made by husbands. This involves being passive and not fully engaging in one's role as a husband and father. Rather than just showing up and going through the motions, husbands should strive to bring their full presence, heart, and energy into their roles. They should actively pursue personal growth, continually strive to improve their relationships, and remain passionate and convicted in their commitment to their families. Being proactive and forward-moving is essential for maintaining a healthy and fulfilling marriage.
Holding wives accountable and avoiding passivity
Having a backbone and holding wives accountable is another important aspect of masculine leadership within marriage. Many men struggle with being overly passive and allowing their wives to dominate the relationship. However, husbands need to be able to lovingly call their wives to repentance when necessary and address any detrimental behavior or attitudes. This requires having the courage to stand up to their wives and actively fulfill their role as the spiritual leaders and protectors of their families. By doing so, husbands can foster a healthier and more balanced dynamic within their marriages.
Mistake 1: Misunderstanding masculinity and failing to embody virtuous traits
It is crucial for men to understand and embody masculinity in a virtuous, powerful, and empathetic way. Being a real man means balancing strength, assertiveness, and gentleness. It also means having the courage to say no when necessary and holding both oneself and one's wife accountable. Masculine leadership involves taking the responsibility of being the head of the household and understanding that women also have their own responsibilities.
Mistake 2: Believing in the 'happy wife, happy life' lie
The notion that a man's primary goal should be to keep his wife happy at all costs is a flawed idea. A man's purpose should extend beyond solely pleasing his wife emotionally. Instead, he should strive to be a man on a mission, pursuing his own growth and purpose while leading his family. Seeking a happy wife is not the path to a fulfilling marriage. Rather, it is a man's own growth and strength that can contribute to his wife's happiness.
Brendan & Mike discuss 7 common mistakes men are making in their marriages, and what they can do to fix them. Lots of tactical advice, hard hitting reminders and practical wisdom is shared in this one!
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INTRO: (00:50)
Mistake #1: Being indecisive. (05:58)
Mistake #2: Coasting and just going through the motions. (13:10)
Mistake #3: Having no backbone and not holding your wife accountable. (20:10)
Mistake #4: Believing the “happy wife, happy life” lie. (27:50)
Mistake #5: Treating her like your roommate or your bro. (36:20)
Mistake #6: Failing to spiritually shepherd your family. (41:06)
Mistake #7: Misunderstanding what it means to be a protector. (46:40)
Bonus Mistake: (54:10)
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