This engaging discussion dives deep into the complex dynamics of grooming, particularly within neurodivergent communities. Anna Clarke shares fascinating insights on the distinct phases of grooming and the unique vulnerabilities that neurodivergent individuals face. The conversation also touches on manipulative tactics like love bombing and gaslighting. Listeners will learn about recognizing red flags and the importance of trauma-informed support for survivors. Practical advice for parents and communities offers a proactive approach to safeguarding vulnerable individuals.
Anna Clarke shares her late diagnosis of neurodivergence and its profound impact on her self-understanding and interactions with others.
The podcast provides a comprehensive breakdown of grooming phases, highlighting the manipulative tactics employed to gain the victim's trust.
Listeners are encouraged to seek trauma-informed support and advocate for themselves to reclaim their narratives after experiencing grooming.
Deep dives
Acknowledgment of Connection and Community
The podcast emphasizes the importance of recognizing the traditional custodians of the land in Australia and pays respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander peoples. The hosts, Monique Mitchelson and Michelle Livock, highlight their mission to create resources specifically for neurodivergent women, citing the richness of lived experiences and clinical expertise they bring to discussions about neurodiversity. They aim to educate and inspire listeners, focusing on a range of topics from autism to ADHD, thus providing a platform to amplify the voices of neurodivergent women. This commitment to community underpins the podcast's approach to mental health discussions, reinforcing the value of awareness and representation.
Understanding Neurodivergence and Late Diagnosis
Anna Clark, a neurodivergent psychologist, shares her insights on what being neurodivergent means to her, particularly following her late diagnosis of autism and ADHD. She reflects on how this realization transformed her understanding of herself and her interactions with others, emphasizing the positive aspects of diverse thinking. Anna notes that neurodivergence fosters a richer understanding of different cognitive processes and challenges the notion of a singular way of thinking. The experience of connecting with other neurodivergent individuals provided her with a sense of belonging that was previously absent.
Exploring Grooming and Its Impact
The discussion delves into the serious and often unspoken topic of grooming, particularly in the context of sexual abuse. Grooming is defined as a predatory process designed to prepare a target, often a vulnerable individual, for future abuse, involving manipulation and emotional entrapment. The hosts clarify that grooming behaviors can occur in different contexts, not just between adults and children, and emphasize that it is a methodical, calculated process marked by a significant power imbalance. This comprehensive look at grooming highlights its subtlety and the profound impact it has on victims, often leading to confusion and emotional turmoil.
The Phases of Grooming
The process of grooming is broken down into specific phases, each characterized by distinct behaviors aimed at gaining a victim's trust and isolation. Initial phases involve target selection, where predators identify vulnerable individuals, followed by gaining access and establishing rapport. The later phases include desensitizing the victim to inappropriate behavior and maintaining control to ensure silence about the abuse. These stages illustrate the manipulative tactics employed by groomers, which can include emotional manipulation, gaslighting, and love bombing, ultimately leading to a deep psychological and emotional hold over the victim.
Supporting Victims of Grooming
The podcast stresses the importance of community support for individuals who have experienced grooming and abuse, emphasizing the need for safe spaces to disclose experiences without fear of judgment. Listeners are encouraged to advocate for themselves, seek help from trusted individuals, and report incidents to authorities when possible. The journey of healing is highlighted as complex and often fraught with feelings of guilt and shame, making access to trauma-informed support crucial. Ultimately, the message is one of empowerment, urging survivors to reclaim their narratives and emphasizing the responsibility of predators for their actions, rather than that of the victims.
Content warning: This episode discusses grooming and sexual assault. Some listeners may decide to skip this one.
This week Monique interviews fellow psychologist Anna Clarke on grooming. As a multiply neurodivergent psychologist, EMDR therapist, and play therapist, Anna is passionate about supporting care teams with a trauma-informed, neurodivergent-affirming lens, and they are experienced in working with survivors of sexual assault and family violence.
On this episode Monique and Anna unpack this incredibly important topic, including what makes grooming such an insidious, ‘hard to pin down’ practice. Monique and Anna cover:
Anna’s understanding of neurodivergence, their path to discovering their own neurodivergence, and what late identification has meant for them.
What is grooming?
What kinds of relationships have the potential for grooming behaviour?
The distinct phases of grooming.
The factors that increase the likelihood of disabled, neurodivergent, and / or previously traumatised folk being targeted for grooming.
What effect does grooming have on the individual and on their broader support network?
Other forms of manipulation like love bombing and gaslighting.
Signs to look out for – both in the perpetrator and the person being groomed.
Ways that parents and the broader community can protect vulnerable people from grooming.
Anna’s advice for those who have experienced grooming or who suspect they may be experiencing this.
Find out more about Anna’s work on this topic and sign up for their upcoming Grooming Webinar (with all profits being donated to support services for survivors of sexual assault) through Divergent Futures.
Here are some resources we’d recommend:
Blue Knot Foundation. Call 1300 657 380 or email helpline@blueknot.org.au - Supporting adult survivors of childhood trauma and adult survivors of institutional child sexual abuse around the National Redress Scheme. Also has resources for supporters of survivors.
Check out the National Resource on grooming. This page has all the National information for Australia on grooming, and on reporting grooming or abuse.
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