We can learn a lot about eroticism through our sexual nature but it is not the only way that we can experience Eros in life.

If you think of your most exciting sexual experiences where you were just in your most vital, primal nature, where the rapture is so expansive and insatiable until you reach this moment of climax where you’re meeting God, and everything feels like light is exploding all over the place, and your brain entirely turns off.

If you think of those moments and you apply the same kind of idea to a regular moment that has nothing to do with sex at all, what kind of vibration are you inviting into a space if you're doing that? - Vylana Marcus

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Wellness + Wisdom Episode 506

Vylana Marcus, a singer, medicine woman, and Fit For Service fellowship coach, shares her journey from suppressed anger and toxic relationships to finding balance in life and love, how the imbalance of feminine and masculine energy shows up in the world, and the importance of tapping into your goddess energy.

What does sacred sexuality mean to you? Are you ready to redefine the distorted view of sexuality and sensuality?

By the end of this episode, you will understand how you can reclaim your sexuality, what sacred sexuality means, why you need to embrace your darkness in order to heal, and how to connect to your inner goddess.

Listen To Episode 506 As Vylana Marcus Uncovers: [1:30] The Imbalance of The Masculine & The Feminine Energy In The World

Vylana
Becoming present with Vaylana: A short sound healing meditation.
How Josh redefined his view of the feminine.
Rise Of The Goddess (Film)
Goddess Rise (Album) by Vylana
The masculine and feminine energies within all of us.
What inspired her to make music purely about feminine energy, and how her music helps women rediscover themselves.
Why men are shamed for being vulnerable and feeling their emotions.
The balance between the feminine and the masculine.
The importance of asking yourself “How can I be of the highest service in the present moment?”
How slowing down helps us find guidance through the heart.
How the feminine energy allows our intuition to drive us VS how the masculine energy helps us achieve it.
The energetic imbalance in the world: The “more mentality.”
How Vylana invites men to get in touch with their feminine nature.
123 Aubrey Marcus: Own The Day
Why vulnerability is a superpower.

[18:00] Healing Our Sister Wound + Setting Boundaries For Self-Love

430 Zach Bush MD | Sacred Commerce & Community: How To Thrive In 2022
Josh explains men’s point of view on being emotional and why it’s important to come back to a place of love.
Healing the sister wound: Moving from competition and conflict to support between women.
Why feminism is not about hatred towards men and patriarchy.
The masculine energy of God.
Knowing who you are in order to be able to set boundaries without shaming others for the way they participate in the world.
Why a lack of boundaries creates shame.
What happens when our boundaries are crossed and why they are essential for self-love.

[22:15] The Intelligence Of Anger + Why We Need To Feel It

Hawaiian Goddess Madame Pele
Why Madame Pele is a symbol of creation and distraction like a volcano.
Hindu Goddess Kali Ma
How Kali Ma inspired Vylana to make her musical album.
Why receiving reactive rage from her mother’s side of the family scared her and led her away from her own anger.
How lacking boundaries expresses as an explosive reaction and why it’s destructive to relationships.
Into The Fire (Song) by Vylana
Why not allowing yourself to feel anger builds up energy that turns in on yourself.
Unpacking why anger is a valid and intelligent emotion guiding us towards something that needs a change.

[26:22] Releasing Unexpressed Anger

Why aggression in men is widely accepted.
How rejecting a natural part of ourselves, such as anger, can make it difficult to fully love ourselves.
Why women are externally shamed for feeling angry and called crazy.
How Vylana dealt with unexpressed rage and discovered that the root cause of her anger was coming from her childhood trauma.
Why using violence never helped her move the energy when she felt angry.
Ecstatic dance: Moving energies through our body.
How the MadMax movie inspired her to create Into The Fire.
The root emotions hidden behind anger: Sadness, grief, and fear.

[33:00] Discovering The Goddess Energy

Vylana shares her experience with dancing and how she came to discover ecstatic dance through Aubrey.
437 Josh Trent | Death & Rebirth: Why I’m Saying Goodbye to Wellness Force…
How Josh constantly learns about feminine energy.
Why she initially believed that God or Goddess was something outside of ourselves.
The Sofia Code by Kaia Ra
The ka body: Our ethereal body and an energy field around us.
How The Sofia Code completely changed her perspective on Goddesses.
Activating the key code in our DNA to express as a different vibrational being through sound healing.
422 Ian Clark | 1,000 Days To Live: Using Nature’s Wisdom to Turn on Your Wellness Epigenetics
Vylana explains what initiation ceremonies are.
How she transformed her life and healed her wounds after reading The Sofia Code.

[41:30] The Goddess Archetype

Vylana’s definition of Goddess and the archetype of Goddesses.
How we express each archetype as humans and why the Goddess energy exists within all men and women.
Why Josh wants to honor the truth of things and what he thinks the meaning of Goddess is.
Shakti energy: The part of us that’s evolving and expanding.
Why Vylana believes that Goddess is a specific signature of the greater whole.

[46:10] Eroticism, Sexuality + Sensuality

The story of Vylana shooting a videoclip to her song and why she promised all scenes would be authentic.
Letting die the part of her that was afraid to be judged, the need for validation that she was on the right path, and trying to be a certain way.
The distorted view of feminine sexuality and sensuality.
Why there’s not a lot of raw authentic nature in men and women.
Vylana dives into why she feels gifted and guided by the universe to express her sexuality.
Why she cares more about the inspiration she creates than the judgment she receives.
Being the vessel for something greater than her: Why the Goddess moving through her is not about her.
The importance of having compassion for people who live a different story than us.

[52:40] Erotic Nature + What It Means To Fuck The World Open

Immediate gratification from validation on social media.
Do women feel liberated when they post sexualized images of themselves?
Why we shouldn’t shame people when we don’t truly know their truth.
Difference between male and female eroticism: Giving vs receiving.
Identifying with the feminine on masculine polarity despite our gender.
Why feminine eroticism is more like kundalini.
What it means to fuck the world open according to Vylana: The divine allurement of cosmos.
Rabbi Marc Gafni
Why anything in life can be erotic and how we can learn a lot about eroticism through our sexual nature even though it’s not the only way to experience Eros in life.
Applying our eroticism in regular moments to invite a different vibration.

[01:03:40] Divine Allurement + Reclaiming Sexuality

The etymology of the word fuck according to Josh.
Why Vylana’s work is purely about planting a seed of inspiration.
Creating a movement of reclamation that shift cultures.
Divine allurement and sexual energy: The desire of two people to merge and become one.
How the feminine energy allures the masculine into beautiful things in life.
How shifting from projection to tuning into the energy shows you something you’re also able to tap.
How feeling safe around the masculine energy lets us fully open and reflects in our lives.
Layla Martin
Reclaiming sexuality and pleasure: Why is pleasure are the birthright and why it’s being shamed by social constructs?
Why commodifying sexuality is actually a good thing.
The worldwide sexual revolution: How we are moving towards who we truly are.
Why pure sex energy is like a cosmic blanket for Josh.

[01:12:20] Pure VS Pseudo Eroticism

Pseudo-Eros: Experiencing sexual energy from a place of pain.
Why bringing awareness and honesty into sex can be healing for us.
How Vylana unlocked her pleasure after an argument with her husband.
What drove Josh to watch porn for two decades and how he broke free from the addiction.
The importance of having an intimate relationship with yourself and asking yourself “where is this impulse coming from?”
How we chase the pseudo-Eros in everything in our lives and why we need to give our inner child a lot of love to be able to stop.
Searching for quick gratification vs doing the deeper work.
Why all of us crave to be loved, seen, and validated to feel like we matter.

[01:20:30] Why We Need Courage To Heal

Cultivating the courage to let go.
Why Vylana had to find the courage to let go of participating in toxic relationships.
How chaos and toxic environments can make us feel safe when that’s all that we know.
Vylana’s spiritual bypassing: Why she agreed to a three-way relationship even though she didn’t want it.
Why she thought setting boundaries would make her lose love.
Divine intervention: How she met her darkness and decided to make a life that is true to herself.
Why we hold our shadow in shame and how we can confront it.
How she discovered her shadows during an Ayahuasca ceremony.

[01:28:40] Toxic Relationships + Communication Barriers

How a past toxic relationship made her realize that she has basic human needs.
Why love is not limited, only time is.
How being in survival mode makes us unable to be compassionate.
Vylana uncovers why it’s important to move forward when the situation doesn’t resonate with our needs.
Communication struggles in an anxious-avoidant attachment dynamic.
How she started rediscovering herself after hitting rock bottom.

[01:33:30] Embracing Our Darkness To Find Our Superpowers

Pussy: A Reclamation by Regena Thomashauer
Why we go through the darkness in order to become who we are meant to become.
The difference between healing through love vs healing through pain.
How we can find our superpowers by learning what we don’t want.
How Vylana’s rage and grief created her art.
Why educating yourself on different ideas and giving ourself full permission to heal are crucial steps in healing.

[01:38:20] How To Move Through Darkness To Heal Our Wounds

369 Paul Chek | All Is God: Three Part Series
The world of duality and why we need to acknowledge our own darkness.
What it means that the darkness enters through the wound.
The Red Book by Carl Jung
Why there is a disconnection from the entirety of being.
Vylana shares why honesty, authenticity, and safety are what make sexuality sacred.
In what ways her relationship with Aubrey is sacred now and why she used to be triggered by other women.
Why she felt resentment towards masculine lust.
How To Prepare For True Love with Aubrey & Vylana Marcus | Aubrey Marcus Podcast
How she tapped into her bisexuality and stopped being ashamed about it.
The freedom that comes from safety.
Why lust and being attracted to other women is natural for men.
Why Vylana thinks her dharma is to push a new sexual narrative.

[01:50:30] Parenting + Sexual Exploration

Planning to be parents and how it could change the current sexual dynamic.
Why Vylana and Aubrey are committed to making their sexual relationship a priority.
The importance of being true to what is true to you.
Why she made sure she was doing the sexual exploration for her and not for her partner.
How she discovered she was attracted to women and why female bisexuality is more accepted than male bisexuality.

[01:57:20] Letting Yourself Connect To Your Pleasure

Hedonism: Everything should be pleasure without boundaries and care for others.
Why sexual and non-sexual pleasure is purifying to Vylana.
Polarity and the cycle of life: Why destruction is necessary for creation.
What it means that pleasure can be found within the desire, and how heartfelt desires guide us to our truth.
Experiencing the richness of aliveness: Why we shouldn’t only focus on pleasure.
What happens when you’re not connected to your pleasure.
The more you can be intimate with yourself, the greater your life can be.
Why being of service and being vulnerable and honest are the tools to live life well to Vylana.
How vulnerability and honesty can shift other people’s lives.

Power Quotes From The Show The Transmutation

"When the energy has the permission to fully move in this full cycle where you’re holding nothing back, what typically happens is that it unveils the sadness, and the grief, and the fear that anger is protecting. The energy of your tears is the transmutation." - Vylana Marcus

Light And Dark Sides

"I can stand here and look at you, and I have done the work to know so deeply who I am in all of my light and my dark, and I know who I am enough to set a boundary and say, 'No, I don’t accept to participate in the world in this way against the patriarchy.' " - Vylana Marcus

Being Of The Highest Service

"How can I be of the highest service at this time, in this present moment? It’s not a practice that’s reaching, and grabbing, and trying to push forward, and make it happen. If you're really in that kind of energy, it takes away your ability to listen to the more subtle whispers. When you’re pushing and being so active like that, the tendency is for it to come through your mind.

There's so much more that we have available if we can slow down, listen for a moment, and actually ask for guidance through our heart." - Vylana Marcus

Links From Today's Show

ABOUT VYLANA MARCUS

Vylana Marcus is a medicine woman, singer, Tahitian dancer, and Fit For Service fellowship coach. She guides people through the realization of their potential using heart-centered modalities.

Her mission as a sound alchemist is to use sound science to facilitate personal transformation and liberate people from the stories that keep them from living in the truth of their magnificence.

She has witnessed sound act as a technology for accelerated healing, transformation, and the manifestation of desired states of being as a facilitator of psychoacoustic experiences for individuals and groups.

She and her husband, Aubrey Marcus, are the founders of the Fit For Service fellowship, a curated fellowship with some of the world's top coaches and experts that is specifically designed to help you become physically, mentally, emotionally, financially, romantically, and spiritually fit to serve the greater good.

Why are people choosing working out over a night out?