Greatest Hits: How Do You Honor a Toxic Parent?

This brings us to one of the “big 10” — the 10 Commandments. There are a couple of things to understand starting with the 10 commandments are divided into two sections. The first four deal primarily with our relationship with God. The last five deal with our relationship to each other. Honoring your parents is the “hinge” in the middle, so which group does it belong to? Well, both. It’s the bridge between the two categories.

When we’re young, our parents stand in for God. By submitting to our parents, we’re learning to submit to God.

To “honor” your parents means to recognize parenthood as the temporary stand-in for God that it is, and you respect your parents accordingly. When you’re young, that means obeying them, and for your whole life it means respecting them.

If your situation is abusive, you need to get yourself out. Call 800-799-SAFE, the domestic violence hotline.

If your situation is not abusive, understand that you can respect the institution your parents represent even when you don’t represent them as individuals. When honoring your parents, you are honoring the God behind your parents whose authority is represented by them.