We read the papers so you don’t have to… Today: Back to home school! The government shut down schools because of unsafe building materials. Plus Get Some Discipline! Conservative MP Penny Mourdant thinks National Service is a good idea. And Eat, Sleep, Score! Football Star Erling Haaland reveals his unusual bedtime routine.

Miranda Sawyer is joined by journalist Marie Le Conte and stand-up comic Fin Taylor.

Follow Paper Cuts:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/papercutsshow

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/papercutsshow

Illustrations by Modern Toss https://moderntoss.com

Written and presented by Miranda Sawyer. Production: Sophie Black. Production Assistants: Adam Wright and Liam Tait. Design: James Parrett. Music: Simon Williams. Managing Editor: Jacob Jarvis. Exec Producer: Martin Bojtos. Group Editor: Andrew Harrison. PAPER CUTS is a Podmasters Production

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

School's out, National Service is in – plus footballer sleep secrets