7 Life Lessons From Jennifer Garner - Dave Woodward - FHR #290

While in Palm Springs for the EY Entrepreneur of the Year awards, Jennifer Garner was one of keynote speakers was Jennifer Garner.  Dave shares the lessons he learned from her.

Tips and Tricks for You and Your Business:

• Embracing Success (2:00)
• The importance of going through the finish line (4:00)
• Go All In! (9:50)
• The stress of success (13:00)

Quotable Moments:

"It doesn’t matter where you’ve been, it matters where you are going"

"Business pushes philanthropy"

"There is no try, there is only do"

"You can’t outsource your relationships"

Important Links:

FunnelHackerRadio.com FunnelHackerRadio.com/freetrial FunnelHackerRadio.com/dreamcar

---Transcript---

Speaker 1:     00:00         Welcome to funnel hacker radio podcast, where we go behind the scenes and uncover the tactics and strategies top entrepreneurs are using to make more sales, dominate their markets, and how you can get those same results. Here is your host, Dave Woodward.

Speaker 2:     00:17         Welcome back to funnel hacker radio. I'm so excited. I'm actually out here in palm springs and just enjoying a joint a day with my wife and uh, just after entrepreneur of the year have met with Russell and collect and she spent a ton of fun just kind of reflecting on things. And one of the things that happened while we were here yesterday afternoon, we had the opportunity of, of, of listening from Jennifer Garner and I love, I love just how authentic she is and how real she is. And I just wanted to kind of share some of the lessons I learned from listening to Jennifer Garner. So what some of the first things she talked about was, it doesn't matter where you've been, it just where you're going. And I know this is a kind of a trite little saying, but she grew up in a Hick town of a West Virginia and really where there was nothing at all and she talked about her growing up and how she had no desire of of being an actor or anything else.

Speaker 2:     01:15         You just didn't even know what that was. A. In fact, the statement she said was, I remember growing up and I thought that Gilligan's island was actually a documentary. I didn't even think of the fact that it could actually been on a set and just understanding the where she came from. She had no concept of, of movies, of Hollywood, of, of anything or like that. And I thought so often in life we get wrapped up as far as of our past and realizing you don't word. It doesn't matter where you've been hurled thing, it just mattered where you're going. I think the other things you talked about was this whole idea of success and how it changed you as you go throughout your life and really the importance of embracing it and using it to build on your dreams. My wife and I were out here and it's been kind of a surreal experience there.

Speaker 2:     01:59         We're sitting in with 200 of the world's greatest entrepreneurs who basically made it and they're successful all brought in by Ernst and young and sitting in the room, you have no idea who's sitting next to you and you have no idea as far as as the level of success at different people have attained it and where you're going. And it was kind of a funny thing where we're sitting there and as the the winners were announced in the technology division. I was obviously I really want to make sure Russell one, and it was an interesting thing. We got done afterwards and we're looking at the person who actually did win and it was Tom Siebel and this is the guy who basically bought, built siebold. The company who Marc Benioff, it learn from it now Marc Benioff is a. We would basically, it was mentored by Siebold who is now gone on to build and create another billion dollar company.

Speaker 2:     02:57         So Russell lost to a who it was just kind of fascinated that they're going, you just have no idea of the level of success. And then the overall winner happened to have been the guy who found a groupon and I'm sitting there going, all these guys are in this audience and you have no idea of the level of success, uh, the different people are at. And I think at times you get so caught up in your own life that you think that your idea of success is a certain level. And then doors get open and you're like, holy smokes, I can't believe what other levels of success are attainable. We had the same experience for those of you guys have been watching the funnel hacker TV. If you haven't, go check it out. We had three episodes in a from dreamforce in San Francisco where we're in Chicago and, uh, two private plans and, and literally within a 24 hour period of time and flying back with grant Cardone, it was just, it was just such a crazy thing when you start realizing how the level of success of the people have in life and where you're at, there's still a whole bunch of other opportunities and other ways of growing.

Speaker 2:     03:54         And so it was interesting to hear her talk about that aspect as well. One of the things she also mentioned was, uh, the time she spent with Matthew mcconaughey on the Dallas buyers club. So she was kind of reminiscing about a lot of the different movies and shows and stuff that she'd been in. And one of the things she talked about was realizing how, how much people give when they're actors, where they go all in, on portraying who they are becoming. And with Matthew mcconaughey, who's become a real good friend of hers by this time, had for Dallas buyers club, lost a ton of weight. And look to the way she described it as completely gaunt and was so weak and she was always afraid as he's walking down the stairs, it wasn't able to make it down the stairs and one of the times she actually saw him, his energy, his trailer there and he'd sit there talking to him, said, Matthew, are you going to be able to make it?

Speaker 2:     04:47         I'm just so concerned about you as a friend and I just wanna make sure you don't make it through this and, and you know what she can eat and you can do other things. And he's like, you know, Jennifer, I'm not focusing on the finish. He says I'm going through the finish line. I thought my wife has been an amazing athlete and still is to this day. And I and I've seen so many different races and marathons she's been in and there's such a difference for those people who make it to the finish line versus those people who are going through the finish line. If you haven't seen it, it's a completely different look on a person's face where they come across the finish line and they keep going because that wasn't the goal wasn't just to get to the finish line. It was I'm going through the finish line and I think that's so important in life that you realize that wherever you set your limit, that's where are you going to go, and so if you said, I'm just going to get to the finish line and I'm done when I'm done versus I'm going through that finish line and I thought that if you look at people who master things in life, that's the approach they take it.

Speaker 2:     05:51         Life is I'm going through the finish line and so I've. I'm really trying to adapt that more in my own life is to make sure that I'm going through the finishing line and not just to it. I want to do the things I really learned a ton from Jennifer on was her ability to pull the emotions of the story from the past to the present. Literally as if it had just happened. And I'm so fascinated by great storytellers because they have this insane ability to elicit so much emotion, just raw, deep seated emotion where you almost want to cry. You, you want to laugh with them, you want to because you feel like it's like you're watching it live right then and there even though they're telling a story that happened to them 20 years ago and it's something I'm really gonna try to spend more time on developing for myself over this next year is that ability to tell stories where you elicit just raw, pure, deep seated emotion where when you were crying, you could actually bring back those tiers when you were laughing.

Speaker 2:     06:53         You bring back the humor. When you are sad and you were experiencing pain, you can bring back those feelings without a destroying you, but in a way that actually helps other people really capture that same feeling that you had by doing it. That's how people are able to learn and to grow and experience things. And I think great storytellers have this insane ability to do that. And Jennifer, she was off the charts crazy with it yesterday. Uh, the other thing I loved was her, this concept of Jennifer has been a spokesperson for years and still to this day, obviously, if those guys would follow, you've seen our capital one that you've seen her involving with saving the children. And so she talks so much about the difference between being a spokesperson versus being an owner. And recently it was kind of fun. The reason she was there speaking to this group of entrepreneurs was because she's become an entrepreneur.

Speaker 2:     07:48         She's now become a business owner. And she says, and this is one of the guy believes soul so hard at the end that is business pushes philanthropy. And what she meant by that is it's one thing as a spokesperson to speak on behalf of a philanthropic idea, whereas this totally different experience to be a business owner where you can contribute your dollars, your time and everything else to that. Uh, so recently she, her whole thing is about kids and about saving the children and about making sure that young kids and young families are able to have farm fresh food. And so she's now has invested in and become a, a, a whole network of farms called once upon a farm. And our whole reason to doing that is because she wanted to be, as a business owner, to be able to contribute not only money and not only be a spokesperson, but to really crafted the business and the direction the business was going.

Speaker 2:     08:41         She goes, the hardest part as a spokesperson is you have all these great ideas you'd like to have let people know about, but they don't care because you're not the business owner. You're a hired hand. And I think the, the idea here as business owners, we have the ability to really push whatever philanthropic idea we want because you're the ones who are contributing the money behind it. You're the ones who were building it and driving it. And so I think, uh, we've tried to do the same thing with click funnels. We did donate to a dollar for every single follow that gets published to village impact. Uh, we spent over a million dollars last year, invested a million in, and they'll be a million dollars for our operation underground railroad by creating a, by filming, a documentary, paying for the documentary, and then using that documentaries you've gotten to raise money. We're now in the process of hiring an affiliate manager.

Speaker 2:     09:27         In fact, for those of you guys who might be interested, this by all means, reach out to me. If you're wanting to be an affiliate manager for operation underground railroad, by all means, let me know because we're in the process of trying to hire someone to help push this, this mission and this passion forward. And that's what you have the ability to do as a business owner, is to be able to actually make change happen. One of the things she talked about was, uh, this, some of the advice she said is, be decisive. In other words, go all in. Don't dabble. Don't dip your toe in. Realize whatever you're going to do, go all in on this thing. Focus on and spend. Don't just so often people and drives me crazy. I hear this happen all the time. Well, I'm going to try this. No, it doesn't work.

Speaker 2:     10:10         If you're going to try it, they'll never work. Uh, I think it's back to Yoda saying there is no one. There is no try. There's only do. And I think that's the whole idea here is you've got to go all in. I don't care if it's all in, on your business, all in, in your relationships, all in your parenting. Whenever you're going to do, go all in on it, man. Have a ton of fun. Get excited about it. It's one of the things I've loved, I admire so much with my wife is she has this insane ability when she's in something, she's all in it and I've. It's one of the things I'm so attracted to her because of this ability she has, if going all in with our kids. She's all in and our kids, I mean it's 100 percent as a mom. She's raising our kids in and 100 percent all in, in our relationship.

Speaker 2:     10:55         She's all in, in her church. Callings and service. She's all in on it. And I think that as you take a look at life, the people who enjoy life and experience life and love life the most, it's because they go all in on it. And I think too often people dabble thinking, I'm going to try this. I'm gonna try that. There is no try. There's only do so go all in. Have a ton of fun and experience life that way. That's the only way you truly get the most out of life without sending. I think she talked about this whole concept as far as balance in life. There is no such thing as really a balance, but you have to kind of look at it day by day and week by week and year to year. And as you kind of pay attention to those things on time capsules, you'll find areas where, you know, what, it's been a long time since I've focused in this area in my life.

Speaker 2:     11:41         And you got to go focus on that. Um, I think my wife and I were talking about it today as far as this idea that you cannot, you can't outsource certain things in your life. And one of the things you cannot outsource or your relationships, you just can't do it. You gotta you have, that's the one thing. I mean I can outsource a ton of other stuff at work and at home, but the one thing you cannot outsource or your relationships and you guys spend time, you've got to focus. You've got to develop those and build those. The one thing you can't outsource. So go all in, be excited and spend the time developing those relationships. The last thing, uh, the interviewer though, it was actually a friend of hers, she lifelong friend, she'd grown up with basically in her early days in New York trying to try to get jobs and interviewing for parts and all that kind of stuff.

Speaker 2:     12:34         And she was Korean, was sitting there asking her, so what would, what would you tell yourself today that you would do that would be important for your 28 year old self to know? And she goes at 20 slash 20. It was when Jennifer was just starting to have success and says, you know, Jennifer, what would Jennifer's now 46 as she sat on 46 and a half, just made me have a little bit 46 and a half, so it's almost 20 years before she had her first success. He says, what would you tell yourself? You went back to your 20 year old self will be the life lessons and things you would want your 28 year old self to know. And it's kind of funny because Jennifer said, you know what? The first thing I would tell myself as soon as you start having success is to understand, understand that success is stressful.

Speaker 2:     13:19         And so the very first thing I would do is I would, I would get, I would get a coach and I'd start therapy and everybody started laughing. She goes, no, I'm really serious. You have to understand that success is stressful and it will literally eat you up. And as I sat there, I thought, you know what? The greatest things I've done in my life, things I've learned the most is the importance of having mentors. Having coaches and she was talking about the same thing. Get a mentor, get a coach, get involved in therapy, find someone who can help you manage all the craziness that's going to go on in your life. And so as I take a look at all the things that have happened, the things I've enjoyed the most is when I started hiring coaches in my life and mentors, uh, for those of you guys have been following you on facebook or even hearing a lot of my podcast, uh, this, this last year, I've hired three different coaches.

Speaker 2:     14:07         I've got a coach for our financial goals and things where I'm trying to go to financially. I hired another coach as far as a trainer. I'm getting up at 4:33 days a week and it's the most brutal time and I hate it, but I love it and I'm so grateful for Eric and for all the things that he's helped me learn. I'm learning proper form and techniques and it's one of those things were working out as never. It's been one thing I've always wanted to do, but I've never focused on it and I didn't focus on it until I got a coach and I'm so thankful for him and I'm obviously I'd, I would love to have these rippling muscles and everything else. I'm not there yet, but what I am is I'm learning and I'm growing and I'm, I'm. I'm really loving getting in shape and staying in shape and focusing on it.

Speaker 2:     14:54         So realize you've got to hire a coach. And then the other coach have hired recently as a personal coach, a Jerrick Robbins, Tony's son. I hired him to help me with some of the things that my own personal life and in business and I've loved the time I spent with all three of these coaches and so I highly recommend that one of the most important things for you to make sure that you're doing is you're hiring mentors. You're hiring coaches. You're getting therapy or you're going through and that. You're using that to realize that success is stressful and your level of success. Every depends on the people you're associated with and the people you hire. And the people you're getting coached by and mentored by, so realize that you have to use coaches in your life. And I'm a huge, huge proponent of it. So as much as I love going to live events, I also love having coaches.

Speaker 2:     15:39         I hope you guys have an amazing time. Let me know if this kind of content is valued. Gee, I really, again, I value your time and I want to make sure that, uh, anybody who's listening to this, that they're getting something out of this that is a value to you. So please go to itunes rate and review this. Leave me a comment there. Send me a facebook message in instagram, personal message, email, whatever it is. Let me know if this is a value to you. If it's not, I want, I want to change it, I want to stop it because your time is the, is the one thing that I know I can never get more of, neither can use. So I want to make sure that day those you guys were listening to this, that you're getting value out of it. Having an amazing day and we'll talk to you soon.

Speaker 3:     16:15         Hey everybody. Thank you so much for taking the time to listen to the podcast. If you don't mind, could you please share this with others, rate and review this podcast on itunes. It means the world to me or I'm trying to get to as a million downloads here in the next few months and just crush through over $650,000 and I just want to get the next few $100,000 so we can get to a million downloads and see really what I can do to help improve and and get this out to more people. At the same time. If there's a topic, there's something you'd like me to share or someone you'd like me to interview, by all means, just reach out to me on facebook. You can pm me and I'll be more than happy to take any of your feedback as well as at the pub like meaning. If you are more than happy to reach out and have that conversation with you. So again, go to Itunes, rate and review this, share this podcast with others. And let me know how else I can improve this or I can do to make this better for you guys. Thanks.