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What if they died in your hands? [Rebroadcast #220]
Jul 30, 2024
An obstetrician delves into their haunting past while navigating the tumultuous world of medicine. They face the emotional weight of childhood trauma, guilt, and loss, sparked by a tragic delivery. The challenges of managing patient care on a chaotic night expose deep vulnerabilities. As they battle anxiety and PTSD, the story unfolds the journey of healing and the search for forgiveness within the healthcare landscape. This gripping narrative intertwines personal struggle with the complex realities of life and death.
52:04
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Quick takeaways
- The speaker's journey illustrates how childhood trauma and feelings of isolation deeply affected their self-worth and family dynamics.
- The unexpected death of a baby during delivery led the speaker to grapple with guilt and seek healing through therapy and self-acceptance.
Deep dives
Childhood Trauma and Family Dynamics
The speaker reflects on their childhood experiences, including feelings of isolation and a lack of emotional reassurance from their parents. Growing up in a middle-class family, they describe their parents' challenging backgrounds, which influenced the way they interacted with their children. The trauma of being molested during early childhood left a lingering sense of guilt and fear, leading to a feeling of being the 'black sheep' in their own family. This deep-rooted trauma ultimately contributed to a lifelong struggle with self-worth and the belief that they were responsible for negative events in their life.
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