In this podcast, the host reflects on their own journey with avoidant attachment style and explores the challenges of connecting and the loneliness that can come with success. They discuss self-soothing, external validation, and negative perceptions. The conversation focuses on embracing pain, understanding biases, and beginning the transformative journey of self-connection. Through recognizing our patterns, we can pave the way for more authentic relationships with ourselves and others.
Understanding the dynamics of an avoidant attachment style and its impact on creating true connections.
Recognizing and challenging the negative bias that often accompanies anxiety to foster joy and connection.
Deep dives
Recognizing Avoidant Attachment Style
In this podcast episode, Dr. Russell Kennedy explores his realization of having an avoidant attachment style, which he shares with his mother. He explains the tendency to desire connection while also experiencing fear and avoidance. This back-and-forth dynamic between feeling abandoned and engulfed creates anxiety. Dr. Kennedy emphasizes the importance of recognizing this attachment style and its impact on personal relationships and overall anxiety levels.
Inability to Express Needs and Provide Self-Care
Dr. Kennedy reflects on his tendency to prioritize others' needs over his own, acting as a caregiver and struggling to express his own needs. He discusses how this pattern, likely formed during childhood, leads to difficulties in receiving love and creating true connections. This inability to express needs and seek internal validation often leads to external validation-seeking behaviors, anxiety, and various mental health challenges.
Negative Bias and Loss of Connection
Dr. Kennedy delves into the negative bias that many individuals with anxiety possess. He explains how the brain's survival instincts prioritize spotting and avoiding threats, leading to a heightened focus on negative aspects and experiences. This negative bias affects the ability to recognize and embrace positive elements in life, hindering joy and connection. Dr. Kennedy encourages listeners to become aware of this bias, challenge negative perspectives, and create space for positivity and connection in their lives.
In today's episode, I share an intimate reflection on my own journey through understanding my avoidant attachment style, the challenges of truly connecting, and the pervading sense of loneliness that can shadow success.
Drawing from my own experiences, I uncover the roots of our human tendency to both crave and fear connection and how our past shapes our present behavior.
I delve into the power of self-soothing, the dangers of external validation, and the weight of unchecked negative perceptions.
This is a conversation about embracing pain, understanding our inherent biases, and beginning the transformative journey of self-connection.
Join me as we explore the profound impact of recognizing our patterns and how, by connecting deeply with ourselves, we can pave the way to more authentic relationships with ourselves and others.
Thank you for listening and you can find me on IG: @theanxietymd if you have any questions.
PS. If you would like to join the MBRX family of 1900+ anxiety WARRIORS who are shifting from coping with their anxiety to actually HEALING it, click the link below: