Teaching Sons That Every Struggle Is an Opportunity to Grow ft. Ethan Hagner

Oct 8, 2025

Ethan Hagner, the son of the host, shares his journey navigating pressure and growth as he transitions into adulthood. He candidly discusses the emotional challenges he faces, including the weight of school and the impact of overwhelm. The duo explores the importance of personal ownership over blame, and how small actions can shift one's mindset. Ethan provides insights from his wrestling experiences, emphasizing discipline while cautioning against unhealthy pressure. Their conversation highlights the vital role of support and perspective in managing life's challenges.

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INSIGHT

Awareness Creates Choice

Awareness creates a gap between reaction and choice that lets you change behavior.
Recognize when something's off before trying to fix it so you can choose a better response.

ADVICE

Break Big Tasks Into Small Wins

Break big, vague goals into small, winnable steps to create momentum.
Start with one task and use each completion to drive the next action.

ADVICE

Write A Handwritten List First

Use simple lists and handwritten notes to map tasks and lower stress quickly.
Crossing items off creates momentum that breaks paralysis and builds confidence.

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In this candid father-son episode of the Dad Edge Podcast, I sit down once again with my son Ethan for a real-time look at what growth, struggle, and emotional awareness look like in the life of a young man. We dive into why ownership is key when navigating life’s challenges, how to catch yourself when falling into patterns of blame, and what it takes to shift your state when your mindset is working against you.

This is one of those conversations where nothing is sugarcoated. Ethan opens up about areas where he’s felt “off,” what he’s learned from coaching conversations, and how choosing personal responsibility over defensiveness continues to shape his confidence and leadership.

TIMELINE SUMMARY

[0:00] - Welcoming Ethan back for another check-in

[1:47] - Recognizing emotional off days and calling them out honestly

[3:20] - How state, story, and strategy shape our reality

[5:01] - Catching the victim mindset and flipping the script

[7:14] - Owning mistakes vs. falling into blame or excuses

[9:28] - Ethan on noticing his tone and making intentional corrections

[11:03] - Coaching tools that help interrupt negative spirals

[13:24] - The power of “what’s within your control” thinking

[15:46] - Why your energy impacts others and how to shift it

[18:12] - Seeing every hard moment as feedback, not failure

[20:05] - Final thoughts on presence, responsibility, and consistent growth

5 KEY TAKEAWAYS

1. Awareness Is the First Step Toward Change

Before you can shift your behavior or attitude, you’ve got to recognize when something’s off. Awareness creates the gap between reaction and choice.

2. Victimhood Kills Ownership and Confidence

It’s easy to blame circumstances or others when things go wrong—but choosing responsibility is what builds maturity and trust in yourself.

3. Your State Impacts Your Story

How you feel physically and emotionally influences the narrative you create in your mind. Shifting your state can instantly shift your mindset.

4. Tone Matters in Leadership

Even when your intentions are good, your tone can undermine the message. Ethan shares how he’s learning to adjust and communicate more effectively.

5. Every Struggle Is an Opportunity to Grow

Whether it’s a rough day, a mistake, or a mindset spiral—each one holds the potential for learning, growth, and leadership if you lean into it.

LINKS & RESOURCES

thedadedge.com/legendarybook
25 Questions to Spark Connection With Your Partner: https://www.thedadedge.com/25questions
The Dad Edge Alliance: https://www.thedadedge.com/alliance
Tools for Fathers: https://www.thedadedge.com/tools
Podcast Hub: https://www.thedadedge.com/podcast

If this episode helped you think differently about growth, mindset, or your role as a father, please rate, follow, review, and share the podcast. These moments of connection and reflection can change everything.