Hey everyone! Welcome to today’s episode of the Wright Conversations Podcast! For today’s episode, I’m going to talk about arousal non-concordance, what we can do about it, and the research around arousal. I also talk about the different types of arousal, arousal vs consent, and the importance of communication.

Let’s delve in!

In this Episode You’ll Learn:

• [02:18] What is arousal non-concordance?
• [03:47] Looking at the research.
• [05:08] The types of arousal.
• [08:16] Why am I wet/hard if I’m not subjectively turned on by stimuli?
• [10:52] Why am I not wet/hard?
• [13:05] Non-concordance is not just sexual.

Quotes:

• “There’s a 10% overlap between how women are responding to a situation and what stimuli they feel subjectively aroused by.” [04:32]
• “When the vagina gets wet, it does not mean arousal automatically.” [04:44]
• “[For men] there is a 50% overlap between genital response and subjective sexual arousal.” [04:58]
• “[According to the APA] Arousal is a state of excitement or energy expenditure linked to an emotion.” [05:14]
• “[According to the ISSM] Subjective sexual arousal is the active mental engagement in sex.” [05:33]
• “When the physiological and subjective sexual arousal are not the same, that is when arousal non-concordance occurs.” [06:09]
• “Regardless of what genitals you have, wetness or an erection does not mean that that person is consenting to the activity.” [10:29]
• “Arousal non-concordance happens with every emotional and motivational system we have. If my mouth waters when I bite into a wormy apple, does anybody say to me ‘you said no but your body said yes’?” [13:13]
• “You have to communicate and not just go off of our body’s responses.” [14:52]

Connect with Rachel Wright

Website:            https://rachelwrightnyc.com

Instagram:          @thewright_rachel

Twitter:              @thewrightrachel

Resources

Come As You Are, by Emily Nagoski.

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