Vulnerability Lover: Windham’s Sex Stories

Exploring impact play, swinger parties, and the power of dominant caregiving—Windham shares how shame gave way to full-spectrum connection.

📈 STATS | 53 straight white cis man, divorced, partnered, kinky dom/daddy, former journalist, current higher ed professional, lives in Boston, into: chains, padlocks, saliva, pee, group sex, impact play, spanking benches, restraint furniture, homemade porn, and emotional vulnerability

⏰ TIME CODE

00:00 Shame-o-meter check: from 8 to 2, and what great sex looks like with his current long-distance partner

04:00 Growing up without physical affection, childhood curiosity, and discovering “My Secret Garden” at age 9

08:00 Losing virginity to an older coworker at 17 and how early dynamics shaped his respect and awareness in relationships

11:00 A 14-year marriage with no sexual growth, the rise of the internet, and the start of kink exploration

13:00 Finding community online, discovering BDSM and impact play, and the appeal of psychological over physical domination

17:20 Online dating as a safe space to reveal kink interests—strategies, subtlety, and how he filtered for D/s compatibility

21:41 Saying “everything” too early, rejection from partners, and learning to filter without giving up authenticity

24:00 Breath play gone wrong, pacing disclosure, and the power of being invited vs. overbearing

26:00 First swinger party with an extroverted partner: how she got naked first and made friends before play

29:00 How she made him feel safe at parties, female-led swinger spaces, and his first real partner in kink

32:00 Going to a dungeon for the first time: what he saw, how he felt, and why he just watched from a corner

35:00 Swingers vs. dungeon folks—two different worlds with minimal overlap, and why both judge each other

38:00 Dom/daddy/sadist pie chart: caregiving, power, pain, and balancing dynamics in long-term play

41:00 Locking leather restraints, using real police handcuffs, restraint benches, and the joy of padlocks

43:00 Chain flogging, heavy metal kink, and why real weight and sound matter in sensory play

45:00 Wax and saran wrap bondage, learning from mistakes, and the physical intensity of full immobilization

48:00 Sensory deprivation: claustrophobia, hood fantasies, and their mutual “thought experiments”

50:00 Pee play and saliva as turn-ons, outdoor and morning sex desires, and making space for mess

54:00 Plans for making homemade porn, exhibitionist energy, and his partner’s eagerness to film

56:00 Craving enthusiastic acceptance, not filtered tolerance—and finally finding it after decades

58:00 Handjob and blowjob preferences, tongue everywhere, and redefining pegging in a dominant role

61:00 Swinger pool party with five couples, how his partner surprised him, and feeling protective throughout

65:00 Needing connection more than romance: why he can’t play without mutual emotional access

68:00 Group sex as “crack cocaine for the brain,” hopes for four-person connection, and swinger resorts

70:00 Getting aroused while comforting his crying partner—and the emotional conflict of being a sadist

73:00 Wanting to grow his sadist side, why spanking leaves him conflicted, and how shared pain brings connection

76:00 Reflecting on youth, sexual evolution, and being grateful for every step that led to this point

🤩 TOPICS | Adult development, bodily reaction to submission, blowjob hesitation, caregiving in relationships, chain restraints, cock worship, communication styles in dating, creating trust through consent, cry-induced arousal, daddy kink dynamics, dating post-divorce, dom-led gangbang prep, dominant energy orchestration, dominant personality traits, dominant topping from below, emotional communication, energetic compatibility, erotic humiliation, erotic punishment rituals, intellectual attraction, introvert in sex-positive spaces, kink-friendly dating tips, kinky extrovert behavior, late-blooming confidence, long-distance intimacy, nipple marks, padlock fetish, partner-led exhibitionism, pegging protocol, personal growth after divorce, relationship introspection, rethinking monogamy, restraint furniture use, rough affection, rough body worship, sadomasochist tension, saran wrap mummification, self-discovery through sexuality, sensory restriction, sex education gaps, slippery hand technique, steel bondage gear, sensual awakening, sensual curiosity, throat play, threesome direction, tongue fetish, voyeuristic hosting, and wax kink.

Originally released September 2021.

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