How Do You Balance Reality and Fantasy in Your Books?

Is it your goal in your writing to introduce new fantasies to people that they didn't know they liked or thought they didn't like? Yeah I think because I want people to when they're reading it feel like they're reading something fresh for sure. And I also too want to make sure that what I'm writing books that I'm writing scenes that are safe in all kinds of ways right. So if it's really explicit BDSM like okay we're talking about safe words and then we're using protection, washing our hands and I'm sneaking safe sex in there. I'm gonna get it in there.