2min chapter

The Gray Area with Sean Illing cover image

This changed how I think about love (with Alison Gopnik)

The Gray Area with Sean Illing

CHAPTER

Love Is a Commitment Mechanism

We're capable of developing attachments that by their very nature don't depend on the characteristics of the person we love. If you relied on just contractual tit for tat back and forth, then that would fall apart. It would be very, very hard to have a community of people who would stick to one another if the only reason for sticking with your other person was because you were going to do well out of it.

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