I think I don't know what right words to use okay, it's not about right words or wrong words So so let me and I know I'm I may be a little bit difficult right now So I apologize for that but I do think it's important because if we're so here's the key thing to understand If we're the asshole or not doesn't depend on our feelings does that make sense? It depends on our actions Yeah, I can hear you say that but it's not matching up with what's inside Perfect, right? Because oftentimes we think that we are guilt Determines whether we feel guilty or not determines whether like that's how our mind tells us we did