Is There Something Lost in That Process of Picking Friends?

i find a sort of unsettling is that if i look at the people whom i'm good friends with now, i actually cannot spot any sort of vectors along which i would have been able to n intentionally pick these people. I can't think of a category where it's like, ive if some one is really curious, or if someone is like, really, you know, whatever. And so i feel like theres i feel likeit might be an ocheristic to think about that stuff, but i feel like thereis thet's got to be something lost in that process and its reductionism to an extent.