Today’s we’re going to focus on emotional detachment and distancing. I'll explain what it is and when it's healthy - and maybe even necessary - to do just that. I'm also going to bring forward a harsh criticism of a blogpost on unconditional love that I wrote years ago, after having the experience with parents and adult children needing to distance themselves from family, sometimes painfully, sometimes with relief.
What are some of the situations when emotional distancing or detachment is healthy?
- When expressed boundaries or basic respect for those boundaries isn’t given
- When someone won’t take any responsibility for their hurtful actions or their impact on you or others
- When there’s been a pattern of ‘honeymoon’ with many “I’m sorry’s” and “that’ll never happen agains” – but it does
- When you need a break from neediness
- When others that you love and need to protect are being affected by the chaos
- When you’re getting divorced
Today’s listener email is from a woman from Poland who describes that she’s been scared about the schizophrenia that runs in her family. And she also talks about detaching from an abandoning and abusive dad – but could only allow herself to do that this past year. I’m always so touched when someone takes the time to write – and I’d love to hear from you.
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The podcast on unconditional love being used up
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My book entitled Perfectly Hidden Depression is available here! Its message is specifically for those with a struggle with strong perfectionism which acts to mask underlying emotional pain. But the many self-help techniques described can be used by everyone who chooses to begin to address emotions long hidden away that are clouding and sabotaging your current life.
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