I think the loneliness came from not really being able to articulate exactly what was happening. I it felt like people around me kind of am for their own comfort, wanted to put me in either place. There were days when i felt really weak and veryfr trated and angry and why me? And completely self absorbed and resentful, jealous of my friends. But then there were days when i would have that kind of bolster of resilience come in and feel like, whow. I'm really learning some things here, or maybe i'm getting better, and i'm going to do this next. It made no sense to me, and completely non linear. This am, this hope that was

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