#153: The Man Who Studied 1,000 Deaths to Learn How to Live
The Tim Ferriss Show
How to Let Go of Grudges and Bitternesses
"i have always had a lot of difficulty letting go of grudges and those loops that we tend to repeat," he says. "There's great potency in just being aware hat you're doing it, even before you're able to change it at all." He also talks about how meditation can help with the anger.
At the end of our lives, what do we most wish for? And how can knowing this help you live better lives now? BJ Miller, MD (@zenhospice) knows. BJ is a palliative care physician at Zen Hospice Project in San Francisco, where he thinks deeply about how to create a dignified, graceful end of life for his patients. He is an expert in death, but he’s also learned how we can dramatically improve our own lives, often with very small changes. When you consider that he has guided or been involved with ~1,000 deaths, it’s not surprising that he’s spotted patterns we can all learn from. BJ is also a triple amputee, and his 2015 TED Talk, "Not Whether But How," is a moving reflection on his vision to make empathic end-of-life care available to all, ranked among the top-15 most viewed TED talks of the year. If you want to know what being around death can teach you about living, you'll want to listen to this. I LOVED this conversation, and I hope you do as well. Enjoy. Show notes and links for this episode can be found at www.fourhourworkweek.com/podcast. This podcast is brought to you by Wealthfront. Wealthfront is a massively disruptive (in a good way) set-it-and-forget-it investing service, led by technologists from places like Apple. It has exploded in popularity in the last two years and now has more than $2.5B under management. Why? Because you can get services previously limited to the ultra-wealthy and only pay pennies on the dollar for them, and it’s all through smarter software instead of retail locations and bloated sales teams. Check out wealthfront.com/tim, take their risk assessment quiz, which only takes 2-5 minutes, and they’ll show you—for free–exactly the portfolio they’d put you in. If you want to just take their advice and do it yourself, you can. Well worth a few minutes to explore: wealthfront.com/tim. This podcast is also brought to you by Boll & Branch. There is a lot of nonsense in the bedding business. For instance, did you know thread-count is not a good measurement of quality? It’s a total myth. The “Made in Italy” label? It isn’t something you should necessarily pay extra for because it generally means it’s just finished in Italy and woven in places like China. The general industry mark-up for bedding is 700 to 800 percent at most retailers. Boll & Branch creates incredibly high-quality bedding. They are the same sheets you’ll find at my home in San Francisco. The best part? You can try anything you order at home for 30 days. If you don’t love it, send it back and get a full refund. Go to Boll & Branch and use promo code “TIM” for 20% off your entire order. Whether sheets, towels, blankets, duvet covers, or anything else. Shipping is always free.
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