Birthday Parties - I'm Not Afraid

I'm trying to think if there's like a weird birthday party in my childhood that just traumatized me. My birthday is end of May, which is deep during exam season No matter what. I don't want to be the center of attention. This was in the age where like you don't get to choose who's coming to the birthday party. It just never invites everyone. Yeah. Maybe be like a subconscious reason. Before that? Like when you're like elementary school, like primary school. And so a lot of birthday parties would joint birth parties. yeah. Did you guys ever have like your own special birthday parties as a kid? I don't know If that's like a