I think for me, those stories, or any story, i think i brought this up before, is it disempowering? You, and allowing you to so to be lazy about something, or is it elevating you? And its arer ticotomy. Cause ultimately, the biggest sort of gift modern psychology is turned to push is hidden there. But usually psycholoogists try to help you get there, which is uroca, just the way you are,. but not in a oh, it's fine that i'm rude to my friends and, you know, i haven't seen my child. It's sort of like an acceptance wher you're at,