Reimagining Connection in a Changing World

As we head into the solstice- that moment when the sun stands still—whether you're in the northern hemisphere where we have the longest day, or the southern, where it's the longest night—this solstice feels like a moment of transformation.

The world is turning over, turning a page. The old system is visibly—palpably—breaking apart. A new system will arise from the ashes, because there is always going to be a system. The question is what it looks like, works like, feels like. We are a prosocial, communitarian species, but our culture has shattered from our knowing of our integral place in the All That Is, so it's possible we might end up with a system predicated on hatred, underpinned by fear, where a small number of incredibly frightened people let their traumatised parts run a scorched earth policy in an effort to hold back everything of which they are most afraid, but I am increasingly hopeful that what we're seeing in places is the extinction burst of the old system: its death throes if you like.

As I record this, there has been an estimated turnout in the US for the No Kings rallies of between ten and twelve million. This is an astonishing number. If it's true, it's well within shouting distance of the 3.5% of the total population that was considered a tipping point in previous social movements in our recent history: the abolition of slavery in the UK, the civil rights movement in the US, gay marriage in too many nations to count. The difference is that these numbers are based on a pre-internet age. We genuinely don't know what happens when people can see the images on their phones and realise how many of the people around them share the common values of decency, compassion, integrity, generosity-of-spirit. 

So if this is potentially a turning point in the making in the US, how do we make this bigger, grander, more of a global movement?  We know we need total systemic change, but how do we make it happen?  How do we create lasting change in our ways of organising everything from food to water to shelter to education. How do we sort our mess of a governance system so we can find those with the greatest wisdom and give them as much power as they need and no more, at all the levels of our culture?

As ever, I think the answer lies in our narratives - when ideas become common currency, then we begin to build them into our visions of how the world is and has been and could be. If we can become bold, evolutionary imagineers and craft stories of a different way of organising, loving, relating, caring…then we can live it into being.

Which means we need to know in the marrow of our bones what this feels like. Imagination begins in our perception of the possible and part of the horror of the Trauma culture is the systematic stifling of possibility. From our books to our movies to our TV to our TikTok videos, so much is predicated on Trauma Culture narratives of scarcity, separation and powerlessness.  We are told this is the way the world is. That it is human nature to  lack all morality and engage in zero sum strategies that belittle, disempower and crush everyone around us.  Which it isn't.

Nonetheless, predatory Capitalism is designed to keep us from imagining things differently. If we're stressed about earning enough to survive while at the same time being hooked on the things we absolutely have to have to feel better, and are being steadily more sedated by the incessant dopamine drips of social media…then we literally cannot step out into other ways of being. So this is our task now - to wean ourselves off the stuff we neither need nor (really) want; off the dopamine drips, and onto things that make our hearts sing so we can build new stories predicated on connection, agency and sufficiency; stories where we are self-conscious nodes in the web of life, and it's our job to ask 'What do you want of me?', listen to the answers, then carry them out to the best of our ability.  That's it.

Easy to say. Harder to do.  But we can boil things down to 9 basic concepts:

Three Values: Integrity, Compassion, Generosity-of-Spirit
Three Baselines: Clean Air, Clean Water, Clean Soil
Three ReWoven Connections: between all parts of Ourselves; ourselves and Each Other; Ourselves and the Web of Life.

What happens if every single thing we think or do or say or dream is based in these three sets of three? How would our days change?

This isn't going to happen overnight, but we can make the commitment to live by them now. Here. This moment.  It's not going to be easy: changing behaviours never is. But we have baselines to work from.  And we might focus on one at a time.  What happens if Clean Water is our priority? How does it change how we live?  What happens if we make Integrity the heart and soul of every interaction through our days - beginning with ourselves? What does it feel like to commit to re-weaving clean, clear, courageous, compassionate connections between all parts of ourselves, ourselves and each other, ourselves and the More than Human world?

Clearly I think the inner work is the foundation of everything, though I am aware that this isn't the case for everyone: if you work better in the outer world, if you'd rather lead with head than heart, that's fine, truly.  Go for it.  Find the Values that speak to you and the Baselines you can work with and go for it. 

If the Inner Work speaks more to you then know that we in the west need to heal ten thousand years of Trauma Culture in half a decade. It's been at least that long for some of us since our ancestors knew themselves to be an integral part of the web of life. This is the work of the spiritual warrior. It's going to take astonishing levels of courage and commitment. Nobody is pretending this is easy.  But it is essential.

And because this is the water I swim in, I'd like to share the basics of how we might get there.

It starts with Grounding - with having a clear sense of our physical presence in the world, the flesh and the bones and the teeth of who we are; with sensing the solid earth beneath us as support, containment, holding, as the reality of who and what we are. When our feet are on the earth, there is nowhere left to fall. When we have a sense of roots going down into the earth, we have connection, holding and an open path from the heart of the earth to our heart. If we connect it on up to the heart-mind of the Universe, we have the three hearts in alignment. Just doing this is huge.

But then, as we begin really to live in our bodies, so we can begin to recognise the places where trauma sits; the frozen places, the stuck places, the parts of ourselves that leap to our own defence - and are brilliant and wonderful and creative - but who are probably defending against threats that occurred decades ago, if not longer. We carry generational trauma, civilisational trauma. And the healing is ours to do: the good news is that there's a lot of help out there - that just as we really need it, we're beginning really to get to grips with how healing can happen. One to one work is good if you have the means: the time and the money, but many of us don't - and that doesn't mean we can't do the work.  If you'd like to work in groups there's a huge amount.  We offer Gatherings and the Membership, but there's Listen to Thomas Hübl Mystic Cafe — I'll link to his podcast Point of Relation in the show notes —Tara Brach, Michael Meade, Bill Plotkin, Jon Young…a host of others are offering online work that helps you to reconnect to yourself and the land. You have to find out what helps you best, but there's a lot out there.

So we do the inner work. And in doing it, we become the still point in the whirling world that...