The Importance of Having a Conversation With Family Members

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"It feels like an unknown, but it's helpful to start thinking about it," she says. "Having a conversation with those family members now, I think is important." There are practicalities in terms of financial arrangements and how you're going to deal with your other siblings,. Do you want your family member to go in some form of assisted living? So there's all various types of care arrangements too.

Caring for sick or elderly family members is still mostly women’s work, according to research. The emotional labor and unpredictability of this work takes a heavy toll on caregivers; it impacts our wellbeing, finances, and careers. And while companies have gotten better about acknowledging and accommodating childcare, many could offer more support and flexibility to their employees taking care of adults.

We talk with Anne Bardoel about what the research says about women and eldercare. She’s been through it herself, and she offers strategies to cope with the negative effects like exhaustion, isolation, and depression. She also gives advice to employees and managers on how to start conversations about caregiving commitments. Then, we hear from a woman who was thrust into caring for her parents and in-laws a lot sooner than she expected.

Our HBR reading list:

“No One Should Have to Choose Between Caregiving and Work,” by Jody Gastfriend

“Caring for Your Company’s Caregivers,” by Sarita Gupta and Ai-jen Poo

“Making Caregiving Compatible with Work,” by Nanette Fondas

Email us: womenatwork@hbr.org

Our theme music is Matt Hill’s “City In Motion,” provided by Audio Network.