36. Special Snowflake Syndrome (HTDWP)
Unshamed & Unchained: Carving Space For Self-Healing & Habit Transformation
The Power of Corroboration
"I was in victim mentality for sure with a lot of it," she says. "People corroborate all they want, and then it's on us to decide to believe them." She adds: "Your pain is your heart heart. We don't need to compare"
You are unique. You are one of a kind. Nobody is arguing with that.But it’s possible to take this mentality to an unhelpful level. To a level that:-halts your ability to change-prevents growth-shoots yourself in the footIt’s called Special Snowflake Syndrome.Signs you might be doing this would be if you are thinking:-That works for other people but not for me.-I’m extra broken.-I always have compassion for others in these scenarios, but not for me.-My situation is just different because______-I should know better.-Other people just don’t understand.Basically, special snowflake syndrome is creating an excuse for why something is impossible for you and then believing it, as though it’s a fact.We talk about why do this.3 elements of Special Syndrome:1. Victim mentality. (Impossible)2. Wanting to believe that something is particularly special, hard, and difficult about our lives.3. A way to isolate ourselves.What the Drama Triangle is and how this comes into play here?Some ways that we appreciate our uniqueness are helpful.Other ways, not so much.You’re invited to join our conversation about it, increase your awareness, and get intentional about your approach.What if you can both appreciate your special-ness (your unique abilities and what only you can offer the world) AND recognize our shared human experience in an empowering, healing way.We can isolate and go it alone. Or we can choose to be in this together.What approach serves you best to create the life you’re wanting?We want to hear from YOU, individually.Lindsay and Danny Poelman are certified life coaches and are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Danny helps guys to stop looking at porn and make their real life and/or marriage what they want it to be. Lindsay helps women let go of the fantasy marriage that doesn’t exist and create the marriage of their dreams in real life.For more information: lindsaypoelman.com or www.dannypoelman.comLindsay’s free Emotional Awareness workbook: https://mailchi.mp/lindsaypoelmancoaching/awarenessFor Danny's free 3-Part video series on How to Stop Looking at Porn:https://mailchi.mp/ecb42a844001/az7gs45o8lSubmit Questions or Recommend Topics you would like us to cover:https://lindsaypoelman.typeform.com/to/dtVOMk
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Danny Poelman is a certified life coach who helps Doctor-Dads Dealing With: burnout, stress, trauma, unwanted habits, and/or strained relationships To heal, sustain, enrich, and maintain a high level of performance in ALL areas of your life (and change unwanted habits), WITHOUT adding more hustle/exhaustion to the equation.
Danny also has years of experience helping guys stop looking at pornography (and be happy about it) and make their real life so good that porn becomes irrelevant. He originally created this podcast to help those who are struggling with porn in their marriage and lives, and who know deep down there's something "more" for them if they just learn the skill of doing life porn free.
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