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A man is created to meet the need of security in a woman before she can genuinely meet his need for appreciation. Episode #66 - Episode #67.
A man creates a “place” of security through three of the following emotional and spiritual dispositions. Disposition is an internal capability that is consistently expressed outwardly, which can be negative or positive:
*Gentleness: strong enough to be “leaned against”. A man needs to have the capability of receiving and tolerating his loved ones’ struggles, pains, problems, and difficulties without negative judgment, sarcasm, or comparison to his own pressures. He has men in his life with whom he shares the pressures of “being a man.”
*Available: able to relate emotionally to loved ones; the man needs to know his own feelings and needs, which makes him able to relate to everyone else in his life. This capacity makes him “response-able,” and therefore, safe because he can relate to others and is responsible for his own actions that come from his own feelings.
*Vulnerable: capable of tolerating hurt as he allows himself to make his needs and desires known, as well as being able to recognize that he may be hurtful to others he loves. A vulnerable person is one who can relate to others and they can be safe with him.
These characteristics infuse the “inner sanctum” of the relationship and the home life with security.
With the influence of gentleness, availability, and vulnerability, the woman (along with other members of the family) experiences three significant things that grow her sense of security.
She experiences an environment of safety, stability, and support:
*Safety: a sense of comfort and confidence in being able to have full self-expression. The woman has found a person in which she can risk her heart in any way she needs to express it.
*Stability: a sense of freedom that comes from dependability and consistency of feelings, words, and actions of the man. The woman knows that he has great tolerance for the struggles that come in life, including daily life.
*Support: a sense of confidence that comes from trustworthy encouragement of the woman’s full-hearted development. She knows that she is encouraged to become all that God created her to become.
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