Using the illusion of control with what/how questions

Chris Voss was the FBI's lead international hostage negotiator… but these days, he's helping CEOs, speakers, and sales pros negotiate million-pound deals, win high-stakes conversations, and get results — without pushing, pitching, or people-pleasing.

In this episode of The Speaking Club, I'm joined by the author of Never Split the Difference to explore how you can use his real-world-tested negotiation techniques to build trust fast, shift resistant clients into action, and speak with more power and presence.

And yes — I even used one of his own tactics to get him to say "yes" to coming on the show! Whether you're trying to book more speaking gigs, close better clients, or simply influence with integrity — this one's packed with actionable diamonds!

What you'll discover:

• How Chris Voss went from SWAT and undercover ops to suicide hotlines and high-stakes hostage negotiation — and why it made him one of the world's top communication experts.
• What compelled Chris to share his FBI-developed negotiation system with the world instead of retiring into the sunset — and how that decision shaped Never Split the Difference.
• The one negotiation tactic that sounds great on paper… but can actually backfire, and what to do instead.
• Chris's ride-or-die technique — the one negotiation move he'd keep if all others were off the table.
• The common "influence" move that actually kills deals faster than anything — and what to replace it with.
• How Chris would handle a client who's stalling on a deadline or payment — and the exact question he'd use to move them into action.
• The subtle ways Chris reads and influences a room when he's speaking — and how his FBI experience shapes his delivery and timing.
• Why "labelling the room" during a talk can deepen audience connection — and how to read silent resistance and adjust in the moment.
• What the concept of the "Black Swan" means for public speaking — and how spotting the right insight can completely change your impact.
• How to make your audience feel in control (even if you're the one guiding them) — and why that's the secret to ethical influence and increased action.
• Why "Yes is nothing without how" — and how to use this principle in your calls to action so that people actually follow through after your talk.

Enjoy!

If you'd like to watch the video of the episode, you can do that here>>

Guest Information: Website: https://www.blackswanltd.com/chris-voss LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/christophervoss

Books & Resources*:

Start with No by Jim Camp

The Rise of Superman by Steven Kotler

Stealing Fire by Steven Kotler

The Talent Code by Daniel Coyle

Speaking Resources: Grab Your From Blank Page to Stage Guide and Nail the Topic for a Client Winning Talk: https://saraharcher.co.uk/newguide-tsc

Want to get better at finding and sharing your stories then check out our FREE Five Day Snackable Story Challenge: https://www.saraharcher.co.uk/challenge

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