What Do You Want From Me? I Don't Want Anything From You

Care was one of two things growing up. Either it wasn't existent and I was left to be really unfamiliar to what it even felt like. Or it was consumptive where it had an agenda behind it to consume me or need something from me. And so the areas that were the most dysregulating were areas where I couldn't discern which one was happening. It created quite a panic in me. Because I neither wanted to be consumed by someone nor did I know what to do with authentic care.