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The Meta-Architecture of Socialization
Can't you have empathy while also not having a similar architecture, cognitive architecture as the others in the group? I think, yes. You need to be able to embrace the architecture of the other, to some degree or find some shared common ground. And it's also this issue that if you are inert, normies often, basically, neurotypical people have difficulty to resonate with you. They have difficulty understanding you unless they have enough wisdom to feel what's going on there.