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Are We Trying to Control the Desire of Our Spouse?
Lin: We are so afraid of the person we love not needing us. And because we're so terrified, and because we have a hard time excepting ourselves as odd, limited human beings, wed instinctively want to keep somebody from really knowing who we are. I can understand why we want it in a way, but it it doesn't end up working. It ultimately makes love, when you get it, feel like it's transactional. So i think men often given the idea that the way to be a man is to be stronger than the woman,. To find a damsel in distress. Because then, you know, she's just going to think like, he's answered all my