Navigating Grief and Identity Reformation

Talking points: grief, loss, relationships, masculinity, anger

I met David at a psychotherapy symposium a while back, and it wasn’t long before we were sharing some of the things we’ve grieved. He just has that calm yet strong presence. He’s also, of course, an absolute expert therapist. We dig into everything loss in this episode; how the 5 stages actually work, what death does both for and to us, and much, much more. This is absolutely an episode to share with someone you feel could use it.

(00:00:00) - Intro, do men and women grieve differently, and the toll of not grieving

(00:06:34) - Why unprocessed grief manifests as anger, anxiety, and more

(00:11:10) - What brought David into grief work, the five stages, and where people get stuck

(00:24:43) - On the loss of David’s son

(00:32:12) - Does grief reshape identity, and the different ways of moving through it

(00:35:50) - How to move through grief, and discerning when to “live again”

(00:42:51) - David’s take on death denial, living currently, and how death challenges our assumptions

(00:50:43) - The sixth stage of grief, and the nuances of meaning after loss

David Kessler is one of the world’s foremost experts on grief and loss. His experience with thousands of people on the edge of life and death has taught him the secrets to living a happy and fulfilled life, even after life’s tragedies. He is the author of six books, including the new bestselling book, Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief. He co-authored two books with Elisabeth Kubler Ross, including On Grief and Grieving updated her 5 stages for grief. His first book, The Needs of The Dying received praise from Saint (Mother) Teresa.

David’s personal experience as a child witnessing a mass shooting while his mother was dying in a hospital helped him begin his journey. For most of his life, David has taught physicians, nurses, counselors, police, and first responders about the end of life, trauma, and grief. He facilitates talks, workshops and retreats for those experiencing grief. However, despite his vast knowledge on grief, his life was turned upside down by the sudden death of his twenty-one-year-old son. It inspired him to write his newest book, Finding Meaning.

David’s volunteer work includes being an LAPD Specialist Reserve for traumatic events as well as having served on the Red Cross’s disaster services team. He worked for over a decade in a three-hospital system, and was even trained for bio-terrorism events and epidemics/pandemics. 

Connect with David

-Website: https://grief.com/

-Book: Finding Meaning: The Sixth Stage of Grief: https://grief.com/sixth-stage-of-grief/

-Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamdavidkessler/

-Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/IamDavidKessler/

-YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/davidkesslerongrief

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This episode is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Easily match with a therapist who can help you through the tough times and empower your best self. Visit BetterHelp.com/mantalks today to get 10% off your first month

Pick up my book, Men's Work: A Practical Guide To Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, And Find Freedom: https://mantalks.com/mens-work-book/

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