You also joined a woman's s and m society called the outcast. Those magazines introduced me to my own sort of private realization that i was gay at the time, although it was another 25 years before i publicly came out. And you go on to say that you needed to push yourself to get over the enormous amount of fear you had around your body. Where do you think that fear came from? Well, it its personal, and it is not on the record in terms of personal, but there was some childhood drama on my part,. "There was an enormous amount of healing that this community brought to me in relationship to trama"