Looser grandparenting and managing favorites

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Today Amie Post joins Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White to talk about grandparenting from a Bowen family systems theory lens. Amie is the keynote speaker at Living Systems’ conference, Aging: Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity on October 17th and 18th. Details below.

Amie Post, is a marriage and family therapist with extensive experience in leadership. She serves as the Executive Director of the Center for Family Systems Theory of Western New York and previously held the role of Executive Director at the Family Crisis Center of Baltimore County. A dedicated student of Bowen Theory since 2001, Amie is a faculty member and board director at the Bowen Center in Washington, DC. She is also a wife, mother, and grandmother.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The basic invitation of growing yourself up and being thoughtful about how to participate in family relationships with intentionality.
• The significance of observing multi-generational patterns and how they influence family relationships. How generational anxiety affects current family dynamics.
• Recognizing automatic expectations of grandparenting roles, doing “differently” than previous generations, and the usefulness of the "beliefs paper" exercise.
• The role of grandparents in providing wisdom and support without overstepping boundaries.
• The importance of meaningful relationships across generations and the resource of the family.
• Examples include: the movies Minari and Moana, childcare, family vacations, the various ways grandparents show up, and “treats at grandma’s house” with a personal example.

This episode is not only for grandparents, but for adult children navigating parenting, grandparenting, and grandchildren, as well as clinicians working with families. 

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 
• Dr. Murray Bowen: Family Therapy in Clinical Practice
• Dr. Jenny Brown: Growing Yourself Up
• Roberta M. Gilbert, M.D.: Connecting with Our Children
• Victoria Harrison: The Belief Paper Assignment, Family Systems Forum, Fall 2022, Vol 24, No. 3
• Living Systems Conference: Aging - Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

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Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:
#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Grandparenting #Grandparents #Grandchildren #Expectations Resources #Transitions #Goals #Generations #GenerationalPatterns #Anxiety #Aging #Parenting #Boundaries #MentalHealth #Relationships #TherapyPodcast #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.