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i'm constantly sort of struggling with this notion of simultaneously being frustrated with society or people not expressing the full extent of their own honesty, and also at the same time struggling to get there myself. And so i think like a lot of the all my life, i've hidden behind this idea that i would say something that maybe pushes people a little further than they're comfortable with as a way to avoid some uncomfortable truth on myself. So this is just like a much bigger theme that that. I think this special specifically did the best job of anything i've done at sort of like threading its way through.