Lara and Carey recap the finale of season one of The Valley aka the best show on television. First, they discuss mammograms, nitrous bliss, parking tickets in Italy and Amanda Knox back on the hot seat once more, the Fall of the House of JLo, and the daemons plaguing Carl Radke. Back in the San Fernando Valley, Brittany and Jax set up for the grand opening of Jax's tavern, and Jax's mean streak against his bride only increases. The funeral dirge for Jesse and Michelle's marriage begins to play, and Zack and Jasmine have it out with Janet, thus beginning the Gays vs Straights civil war. In an epilogue six months later, we see Jax and Brittany FINALLY separated as Brittany begins to visualize a new and improved Jax-free life. Michelle and Jesse attempt to finalize their divorce and Zack goes to Miami with Doute to support her during her non-lipo lipo procedure and gets squirted in the process.
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