I think that at least for my first two projects, the EP in Cheap Queen, that idea of like this unrequited love like that's all I knew. It can be devastating to put yourself out there in a different way from straight people because you're dealing with that second level of like well is that person gay? Are they willing to be gay with me? And then of course there's the dreaded like being in love with someone who isn't interested in you and I think it's even more devastating when they're not interested in you because they're not gay. But they're still toying with you because that's how these bitches roll. So yeah no I definitely was like