"I didn't have confidence in those skills at the time that I became a manager," she says. "So, you know, when I quit that job and stopped being a manager, it was almost a sigh of relief because it felt like I didn't have to pretend to be someone I wasn't anymore." The advice never to apologize for taking up space or offering an idea is not good enough; we need to dig into what's wrong with our own language if we don't feel confident about how we express ourselves. 'When you own a mistake, when you own that something you did cause someone else pain or it costs them time or something that you probably didn't even intend'

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