Aren't Needs in Your Five Secrets?

My wife claims that I never listen! How can I possibly agree with her?  My wife left me! How can I correct the distortions in her criticisms? How can you deal with people who constantly wallow in self-pity? And more!

Hi podcast fans,

Today we've got some terrific Five Secrets questions that you have submitted.

1. Mike #1: I love your Five Secrets of Effective Communication. Why does secret #4, “I Feel” Statements, not include Thought Empathy?
2. Mike #2: I have seen communication models that include expressing and listening for needs. Aren’t needs and wants important and important to express?
3. Al: How can I help my wife recognize her many cognitive distortions, like All-or-Nothing Thinking? It seems hopeless!
4. Guy: If a loved one says, “You never listen,” how could I possibly find the truth in this statement? How could you genuinely agree with an All-or-Nothing statement such as, “You never ….”?
5. Both Sonja and Eileen asked: How can you deal with someone who constantly wallows in self-pity and plays the role of victim. It's exhausting!

Thanks for tuning in, and keep the great questions coming!

David and Rhonda