Flexible habits beat brittle routines

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In this episode, Katy Milkman explains why you keep falling off track and shares tools that will help you start again. She shares why lasting behavior change is so difficult—and what science reveals about how people actually change. Katy also delves into impulsivity, motivation, confidence, habit formation, and why willpower alone so often fails. Katy shares research-backed tools like temptation bundling, commitment devices, and fresh starts. Listeners will walk away with a clearer understanding of why they get stuck, practical strategies to move forward, and permission to stop striving for perfection and start building change that can survive real life. If you’ve ever felt frustrated by starting over—or wondered why good intentions aren’t enough—this conversation offers both clarity and compassion.

Exciting News!!!Coming in March 2026, my new book, ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠How a Little Becomes a Lot: The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life is now available for pre-orders!⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠

Key Takeaways

• vior change through a diagnostic, personalized approach
• The role of impulsivity (present bias) in undermining long-term goals
• Understanding internal barriers to change instead of relying on willpower
• Making goal-aligned behaviors more enjoyable to increase persistence
• Temptation bundling as a strategy for aligning short-term rewards with long-term outcomes
• The importance of confidence and self-efficacy in sustaining change
• Using advice-giving and mentoring to strengthen belief in one’s ability to change
• Commitment devices as tools for overcoming procrastination and self-control challenges
• Flexible habit formation versus rigid routines for long-term consistency
• Embracing fresh starts and setbacks as part of the change process

For full show notes,⁠⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠!⁠

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If you enjoyed this conversation with Katy Milkman, check out these other episodes:

How to Stay Motivated with Ayelet Fishbach

Tiny Habits for Behavior Change with BJ Fogg

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