The Guitar Is Out of Tune

i bought a forty dollar puke green guitar for my girl friend for a joke. I couldn't keep it in tune for like three minutes. Billy gibbons from zezy top comes over to my apartment after a show and we're chatting, and he looks out of the corner of his eye and goes, mind if i play that guitarha ha. That's where it was with these drums. So i walkd in with jeff hamilton, and im pro the best jas drummer, the best drummer. And i give him my whole talking dog speech, and he says, yei get your basse. And i spo i don't thinke said, get your bas ig