Relationships and the Cognitive Load of Checks and Balances

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i hate the idea of being counting, and i don't think anyone really wants to be involved in too many relationships like that. We all have what i call this inner two year old, whose main reaction to everything in the world is, you're not the boss of me. Trying to influence somebody means you are a qute threat in a number of different ways. And people love that, ye, which is also a bit counter intuitive.

What do you think of when you hear the word influence? Or the phrase, “be an influencer?” Maybe you think about the ability to affect another person, to have influence over them. Or, to persuade them to adopt an idea, point of view or opinion. Or, maybe take an action or commit to something, or buy something. Whether we’re comfortable with the notion of influence or persuasion or not, we’re all immersed in overlapping processes of subtle and not-so-subtle influence all day, every day. And to better understand how to both cultivate our own skills and tools, and also become more aware of the scripts that are running all around us, I’m so excited to be able to sit down with my friend, Dr. Zoe Chance.

Zoe is a writer, teacher, researcher, and climate philanthropist obsessed with the topic of interpersonal influence. She earned her doctorate in behavioral science from Harvard and now teaches “Mastering Influence and Persuasion,” the most popular course at Yale School of Management. And, her framework for behavior change is the foundation for Google’s global food policy that helps over 100,000 people make healthier choices every day. Before focusing on academic pursuits, she also managed a $200 million segment of the Barbie brand for Mattel.

Zoe teaches smart, kind people to raise money for charity, get elected to political office, fund startups, start movements, save lives, find love, negotiate great deals and job offers, and even get along better with their kids. In other words, she helps people to use their superpower of influence as a force for good. And, by the way, if you love today’s conversation, you’ll also love her book, Influence is Your Superpower.

You can find Zoe at: Website | Twitter

If you LOVED this episode you’ll also love the conversations we had with Charles Duhigg about building habits.

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