Beyond the High Road: New Perspectives on Discussing Race and Privilege with Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy (275)
Therapist Uncensored Podcast
Intro
The hosts engage in a heartfelt discussion about race and privilege, sharing personal experiences that shed light on societal issues. They emphasize the importance of empathy and self-awareness in the pursuit of social justice, highlighting how suffering can lead to deeper understanding and growth.
Use the VCR Method to navigate difficult conversations without retreating or conflicting.
In this powerful conversation, one of the most influential voices on racial justice and family therapy, Dr. Kenneth Hardy talks with Dr. Ann Kelley about the VCR Method (Validate, Challenge, Request) for navigating difficult conversations without retreating into silence or conflict. Hardy reveals how White-bodied folks and People of Color/Culture (POC) can move beyond either/or thinking by recognizing their multiple selves – the parts that hold privilege and the parts that experience subjugation – no matter who you are.
Key insights include Hardy’s concept of “invisible wounds” – the unnamed racial trauma that affects people of color daily – and why the expectation for Black people to “take the high road” actually perpetuates harm. Through a real example from a heated workshop exchange with a white student, Hardy demonstrates the VCR approach in action, showing how validation, strategic challenge, and clear requests can keep us connected through rupture rather than defaulting to our most activated, subjugated responses.
This episode offers practical tools for therapists and anyone seeking more authentic, healing-centered conversations about difference in general and particularly, race and privilege. Hardy’s framework challenges us to develop both a racial lens and a clear sense of our racial selves, moving from fragility toward the courage to stay in relationship even when conversations get difficult.
“We all have two dimensions of ourselves- a preferred racial view and a dreaded one.” Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
“Racial oppression is a traumatic form of interpersonal violence which can lacerate the spirit, scar the soul, and puncture the psyche.” – Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
Timestamps for Beyond the High Road: New Perspectives on Discussing Race and Privilege with Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy (275)
05:13 Invisible wounds and racial trauma
07:40 The importance of naming and acknowledgment
15:38 Developing a racial lens as a therapist
18:16 The complexity of privilege and subjugation
23:50 Case Study: A white woman’s reaction to privilege
26:48 The intersection of class and race
40:14 The VCR Model: Engaging conversations on race
45:39 Compassionate accountability in conversations
51:13 Hope amidst DEI challenges
About our Guest – Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy is a Clinical and Organizational Consultant at the Eikenberg Institute for Relationships in Newark, DE, where he also serves as Director. He is also the Founder and President of the Eikenberg Academy for Social Justice. He provides Racially Focused Trauma Informed training, executive coaching, and consultation to a diverse network of individuals and organizations throughout the United States and abroad. He is a former Professor of Family Therapy at both Drexel University in Philadelphia, and Syracuse University in New York, and has also served as the Director of Children, Families, and Trauma at the Ackerman Institute for the Family in New York, NY.
Resources for Healing the Invisible Wounds of Racism with Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
Eikenberg Academy for Social Justice – President Kenneth V. Hardy, website and resources
“On Becoming a Racially Sensitive Therapist: Race and Clinical Practice” – Book by Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
“Racial Trauma Clinical Strategies and Techniques for Healing Invisible Wounds” – Book by Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
“The Enduring, Invisible, and Ubiquitous Centrality of Whiteness” – Book by Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
“Some subtleties of whiteness in the workplace: Steps for shifting the paradigm” – Journal by Dr. Kenneth V. Hardy
Enjoying this episode? Check out many other relevant Therapist Uncensored episodes, only two are listed below (use search bar on our website for anything you are interested in learning).
https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/navigating-racial-trauma-part-1-203/
https://therapistuncensored.com/episodes/racial-trauma-challenges-traditional-therapy-part-2-sriw-series-ep-3-204-2/
NEW!
Beyond Attachment Styles course is available NOW!
Learn how your nervous system, your mind, and your relationships work together in a fascinating dance, shaping
who you are and how you connect with others.
Online, Self-Paced, Asynchronous Learning with Quarterly Live Q&A’s – Next Q&A September 5th!
Earn 6 Continuing Education Credits – Available at Checkout
As a listener of this podcast, use code BAS15 for a limited-time discount.
You are invited!
Join our exclusive community to get early access and discounts to things we produce, plus an ad-free, private feed. In addition, receive exclusive episodes recorded just for you. Sign up for our premium Neuronerd plan!! Click here!!
Please support our sponsors – they keep our podcast free and accessible to all!
HUGE OPPORTUNITY, No Kidding! $199 instead of $499 starting 8/14/25!
Superpower’s mission is simple: to democratize health and make proactive, preventive care affordable and accessible for every
body. So if you’re ready to stop guessing and start taking control of your health, head to Superpower.com to learn more and lock in the special $199 price while it lasts. Use discount code TU at checkout. Superpower.com
With added vitamin and minerals, and an upgraded probiotic blend, the new formula is more comprehensive than ever, helping to support immune health, gut health, energy, and more! Check it out at drinkag1.com/TherapistUncensored
The AI-powered Podcast Player
