How to Survive Panic in the Pool

"I think I knew that my life depended on the floaties. This kid just swam up and pulled the fucking, like, the inflator out of my floaty," he says. "It could have been the Green River killer for all I know as a kid." He recalls getting stuck in a rip tide while swimming with his family in Hawaii. It's annoying to be inconvenienced by a global pandemic because you get shamed for saying shit like that,. But I don't know another word for it. All right. And also it's okay to not want things to be like this.