6min chapter

The Daily Show: Ears Edition cover image

Cruz Control: The Ted Cruz Files

The Daily Show: Ears Edition

CHAPTER

The Worst Godfather Ever

Ted Cruz was spotted on a plane traveling to Cancun, Mexico in the midst of this unfolding crisis. One poor Texan had to travel 800 miles just to get heat, water, and electricity. The s*** is ridiculous. You can either have the nuclear codes or you can have the soup, but you definitely cannot have both. So what they need is a photo of my beach bard because if they see me with flames over their eyes I'm not even mad that you were so stupid. How can you be in politics for 10 years and still have no idea how bad this would make you look?

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