The Leftover Rule Problem

My wife Joy is a creature of habit.

She has a rule. After Thanksgiving, nobody goes to a restaurant for breakfast, lunch, or dinner until every single piece of Thanksgiving food is gone. Magically, it always lasts right through Sunday evening.

One year we went to someone else's house for Thanksgiving.

Joy brought leftovers home. The next day she went to the store, came back, and started cooking. I'm thinking you've been cooking for days. You brought leftovers home. What are you cooking? She said she's cooking leftovers.

She purchased a small turkey and all the ingredients to keep her routine for the weekend.

Featured Story

I wanted a dog that looked good in my Jeep.

Got an Australian Shepherd named Levi because Border Collies are crazy and Aussies are just stubborn. Turns out I should've gotten the crazy dog because the stubborn one is exactly like his dad.

I made rookie mistakes training Levi.

One day my trainer said something that changed everything. For a dog, one time means all the time. Every time you let them do something new, they're just going to keep doing it.

That applies to more than dogs.

Joi schedules everything. I literally schedule a spontaneous Saturday date for her. I tell my wife to put in her predictable routine that we're going to be spontaneous on Saturday so she's okay with it. Don't surprise her.

A couple years ago we went elsewhere for Thanksgiving and Joy had a real problem. She has a routine. When a certain time of year comes, she gets the recipes out and does the thing. Now she's not doing the thing.

The look on her face when I figured out what she was doing. Cheating leftovers. She was lying to me about leftovers.

Important Points

For a dog, one time means all the time, and that principle applies to building habits and routines in your own life too.

What makes you happy might seem crazy to someone else, but if it brings you joy, just do what you do.

Respecting other people's routines and quirks is easier when you understand they need those patterns to be happy.

Memorable Quotes

"For a dog, one time means all the time. Every time you let him do something new, they're just going to keep doing it."

"I literally schedule a spontaneous Saturday date for her. She has to know we're going to be spontaneous on Saturday."

"Do leftovers make you happy? What makes you happy? Do what you do. Just do what you do."

Scott's Three-Step Approach

Understand that consistency creates happiness for some people, even if their routines seem excessive to you.

Figure out what actually makes you happy and build those patterns into your life without apology.

If you're married to someone with strong routines, just go with it and maybe hide half the Thanksgiving food so everyone gets leftovers.

Chapter Notes

1:15 - Holiday season stress and choosing to be happy

2:18 - Getting Levi: wanted a dog for my Jeep

3:17 - Dog training wisdom that applies to everything

3:50 - Joi is a creature of habit and routine

4:51 - The serious nature of the leftover problem

5:53 - She was cooking leftovers that weren't leftovers

7:05 - This year's solution: double the food, hide half

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