Losing a Beloved Table and the Search for a Replacement

A few years ago, I was on a desperate search for a dining table. My favorite from my old place was a gorgeous, single-piece antique that mathematically wouldn’t fit in my new home. I loved that table, and losing it felt like losing a member of the family. So I started the hunt for a replacement, a piece worthy of its memory. I found a potential candidate at a high-end furniture store: a stunning cherry table.  I ran my hand along its smooth, cool surface, picturing it loaded with platters of food, surrounded by the people I love. But then I saw the price tag. It was prohibitively expensive. My wallet slammed shut. I knew it was perfect, but I just couldn’t bring myself to pay for it. I walked out, resigning myself to a life of settling. In the end, I found a mass-produced, joined-piece from a department store. And for the next six months, I was miserable. My kitchen table was just … a table. It was functional, but it had no soul. I griped about it constantly, and every time I looked at it, I was reminded of what I'd given up. Discovering Sweat Equity Finally, out of options and patience, I took the advice of an antique store owner. "Go see a woodworker," she said.  I drove to the address, a dingy, dark garage on the southside of town that smelled of sawdust and varnish. Here, in this dusty, disorganized space, I found the most beautiful tables of every shape and size imaginable. A gruff man with calloused hands appeared. I told him about my predicament and my budget. He gave me a direct response: “I can’t build you a table for that price.” Just as I was giving him an obligatory thanks and turning to leave, he hit me with an unexpected question: “Are you interested in learning how to make one? It might cost you less than what I’ve already made.” He wasn’t selling me a table. He was selling me an experience. A partnership. Becoming a Co-Creator And so, we began. He showed me the design software. We walked through different scenarios, from Christmas dinner to my kids doing their homework. We chose the wood, figured out the curves for the legs, and decided on the thickness for the top. Every line was to my specifications. I was a co-creator, not a consumer. When he finally showed me the quote for materials and his lessons, it was 30% more than the expensive showroom table. And yet, the decision was simple. I looked at the plans, the time we’d invested in the design, the conversations we had shared, and I said, "Let's build this." I picked out the perfect piece of maple. He taught me how to cut it, sand it, and shape it. How to use a router to create decorative edges. How to apply gloss for a perfect shine. And when we were done, I paid that higher price gladly—despite all its imperfections (I am not a professional carpenter.). This was my table, built with my sweat, crafted with my hands. I’d earned it. One leg was a half-inch too short.  The decorative edges I’d spent hours on didn’t quite match. And the lacquer? Let’s just say it had a certain, unique texture. This table was, objectively, flawed. And yet, I loved it more than any piece of furniture I had ever owned. When I brought it home, I was so proud. I invited people over just so I could show it off. Every time I looked at it, I found myself thinking how perfect it was, even with its flaws. That slightly askew table wasn’t just furniture; it was a blinding flash of the obvious and a lesson in the concept called The IKEA Effect. Applying the Principle in Sales Not long after my dive into woodworking, I found myself in a similar situation with a prospect. We were selling a sales training program, and the decision-maker leveled with me in our proposal meeting: "I love what you're proposing, but your competitors are beating your price. We're on a budget." I was about to chalk the deal up to closed-lost when the memory of that woodworker's shop flashed through my mind. “How about this,” I said, "I know our price is higher, but I think we—you and I—can design something perfect for your team. What if we work together to craft a custom solution, one that covers all your needs and fits into your company culture?" He was skeptical, but he agreed. So we began our own version of a woodworking project. Instead of sawdust and maple, we worked with spreadsheets and shared documents. We spent hours in meetings, outlining their team's specific pain points, the obstacles they faced with pipeline hygiene, and the skills they were lacking. We designed a plan with the right workshops, the right coaching, and the right support for their specific problems. When I finally presented the final proposal, it included a fee that was 20% higher than the competition. But it wasn't a surprise. We had built it together, every step of the way. He saw not just a list of services, but a reflection of his own team's needs. He had invested time, effort, and insight, and had a sense of ownership. How Co-Creation Wins the Deal With our co-created plan in hand, the client happily paid our higher fee. We’d edged out the competition not because of our price, but because we had triggered The IKEA Effect. This behavioral economic principle states that people place a disproportionately higher value on things they have helped to create. Every frustrating moment, every small victory when we are building something creates what behavioral economists call "effort justification." Your brain can't accept that all that work you put in was for something ordinary, so it reframes the result as extraordinary. It's the same reason my handmade table, with its slight wobble and imperfect edges, felt more valuable to me than the flawless, expensive showroom piece. And it's exactly why that prospect was willing to pay a premium for our sales training. By involving him in crafting the solution—by making him a co-creator rather than just a buyer—we triggered the same psychological principle. He didn't just purchase a program; he helped design it. The Lesson: Ownership Matters When people build something—whether it's furniture, solutions, or relationships—they don't just create the thing itself. They create ownership. Here’s how you can apply this to your own sales process: Discovery is the new co-creation. Your discovery calls shouldn't be a simple Q&A. It should be a collaborative workshop. Use tools like a shared whiteboard or a live-edited document to build the solution with your prospect in real time. Frame it as, "Let's figure this out together." Your proposal is a project plan, not the final word. Think of your proposal as the culmination of shared work, not a final document you deliver. Refer to it as "our plan" or "the solution we designed." This language reinforces the joint effort. Make it their idea. The more effort your prospect invests in the process—even just by providing a little bit of input—the more they'll value the outcome. Ask open-ended questions that require them to provide genuine insight. Say things like, "Help me understand...," or "What would the ideal outcome look like for you?" When they tell you, it's their vision, and you're helping them bring it to life. The Big Takeaway The IKEA Effect is far more than a psychological quirk; it's a strategic weapon for every salesperson who wants to stop losing on price. The truth is, your customers aren’t buying a product or a service—they're buying the feeling of a win.  When you empower your prospects to become co-creators in the sales process, you don't just solve their problem; you make them the hero of their own story.  You don’t need to be the low-price leader to get the business. You just need to have the courage to ask them to build a solution with you. Hear more insights based on real-life business successes and flops on Jeb Blount Jr.’s podcast 30 Minutes or Less: How Flawed Sales Incentive Programs Cost Domino’s $78 Million, part of The Sales Gravy Podcast.