How to Get People to Say Yes to Dinners

“I don’t want fans, I want friends.” This is one of many approaches to relationship-building that I admire in this week’s guest, super-connector Jon Levy. I learned that when Jon texts with “free for dinner tonight?” you cancel all plans and say YES. Both times I did, I ended up at one of his influencer dinners with famous actors, public figures, pro athletes, and C-suite executives. 

Jon’s secret? Designing experiences to facilitate a shared sense of awe, connection, and accomplishment—with job titles revealed only at the end of the evening. Today we’re talking about these principles and more behind his bestselling book, You’re Invited: The Art and Science of Cultivating Influence. I hope you enjoy this conversation as much as I did!

More about Jon: Jon Levy is a behavioral scientist and New York Times bestselling author known for his work in trust, human connection, belonging, and influence. More than a decade ago, Jon founded The Influencers Dinner, a secret dining experience for industry leaders ranging from Nobel laureates, Olympians, celebrities, and executives, to artists and musicians. Guests cook dinner together, but can’t discuss their career or give their last name, and once seated to eat, they reveal who they are. Over time, these dinners developed into a community. With thousands of members, Influencers is the largest community of its type worldwide.

🌟3 Key Takeaways:

• Say yes to invites. If you want higher levels of creativity, new relationships, new ideas—it’s going to happen outside of your standard routines.
• Novelty is critical if you want to be noticed. What are you doing that only you do? Make that one of the key things you talk about and promote.
• Instead of asking why you’re not on social media, or forcing yourself into it, ask “Why should I be on social media? If you don’t have a good reason, don’t stress about it!

✅Next Action: What next group invitation can you send? How can you create a memorable experience around it? 

📘Books Mentioned:

• Free Time: Lose The Busywork, Love Your Business 
• Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One
• The 2 AM Principle
• You’re Invited: The Art and Science of Cultivating Influence

🔗Resources Mentioned: 

• Jon on the web, Instagram: @jonlevytlb, Twitter: @JonLevyTLB
• New York Times feature: Want to Meet Influential New Yorkers? Invite Them to Dinner
• Video: Ted Talk: What Makes Us Influential?, Fortune: The Science of Adventure
• Resources: Upwork, Notion
• TV Show: Old Enough
• Reddit.com

🎧Related Podcast Episodes: 

• 228: How I Run My Business Without Social Media
• 263: Conduct a Relationship Audit with Ximena Vengoechea

❤️ Enjoying the show? I'd be grateful for a rating and/or review! Even better? Share this episode with a friend :)

💌 Get my curated weekly(ish) PivotList newsletter

💬 I’d love to hear what’s on your mind! Take the Pivot listener survey

🗣 Submit a question or comment for future episodes

🎧 Make sure you’re subscribed wherever you listen to ‘casts

📝 Check out full show notes from this episode with links to resources mentioned at http://pivotmethod.com/285

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices