What's the Ideal Nuclear Family?

i think that one of the biggest missteps that we have taken in church sub culture is that, you know, this whole fear versus love piece. And what's fascinating to me is that christians can acknowledge...what the ideal nuclear family is. But so many of our churches function as single parent authoritarian homes with an absent mother and a bunch of children who are expected to distow the line from dad. If that's the way that we view m what it means to be the family of god, then we're goin to be a superdis functional family. Ik?