The Importance of Syntax in a Book

The character elf in schlock mercenary is currently the executive officer for Captain Murtaugh. She had been under the impression that you know she and Kevin might end up in command of the whole company. And so here she is instead of being a captain, she is the executive officer to a captain. You know, she's almost a glorified gopher. The reader knows none of this backstory information. I wanted people to see, oh, he said something and then she was upset. And I'm not sure why she's upset, but it's there.